The marriage rate in this country has fallen nearly 60% in the last half century. So what’s motivating those of us still choosing to say I do? Anita ponders this question with the Hindu officiant who helped her build a ceremony that bridged the gap between her values and her dad's traditional desires. Plus, a comedian and queer ex-nun explains how she takes people from the place of "marriage is a dumpster fire" to a ceremony they're excited about.

Meet the guests:

- Raja Gopal Bhattar is a consultant, author and officiant who Anita and her family worked with to design her wedding ceremony

- Kelli Dunham, a comedian, nurse and queer ex-nun who officiates weddings and funerals — and refers to herself as "queer secular clergy"

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If you want to hear more of Satish Rao on Embodied:

Mixed (Parent Edition), where Anita talks to her parents about growing up mixed race

Pooped, where Satish gets to share his expertise as a gastroenterologist

Please note: This episode originally aired September 26, 2024.

Update: Raja Gopal Bhattar released an interactive memoir, “Queering Constellations: Mapping This Journey Called Life.”

Curtis Chin grew up inside Chung’s Cantonese Cuisine. His great-grandfather first opened the Detroit restaurant in 1940, and in the 1970s and ‘80s Chung’s was the backdrop for many of Curtis’s formative lessons about race, identity and belonging.He talks to Anita about his experience learning how to code-switch as an Asian American and gay kid in a Black and white city — and how serving and observing customers in the restaurant helped him find his own way as a writer, filmmaker and activist.

Meet the guest:

- Curtis Chin is the author of “Everything I Learned, I Learned in a Chinese Restaurant”

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After being raped at 18, journalist Katie Simon had a burning question: How do you navigate sex and intimacy after sexual assault? Katie tells Anita about their journey of trial and error with sex and how connecting with other survivors helped them write the guidebook they wish they’d had years ago. They explore everything from disclosure and triggers to kink and healing — both for survivors and their partners.

Meet the guest

- Katie Simon is the author of “Tell Me What You Like: An Honest Discussion of Sex and Intimacy After Sexual Assault"

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