You’ve tried to cut off the fruit, but the root is still there. In this episode of the Free From Porn Podcast, Richard Young goes through John 8:43–44, where Jesus calls the devil “a liar and the father of lies.” He shows how every bad behavior grows out of a lie you believe.

Many Christian men believe Jesus and still hold on to the enemy’s lies. “I’ll always be an addict.” “Sin doesn’t really hurt me.” “I’ll never be enough.” “I’m not worthy of love.” These lies bring guilt, shame and condemnation. They stir up your emotions until you want to escape, and that escape often leads back to porn. You aren’t in the flesh anymore, and you aren’t sold under sin. When you believe you are, you keep doing the very thing that’s destroying you.

In this episode:

• Why behavior comes from what you believe, and why “the truth will set you free” (John 8:32)
• How the enemy uses guilt, shame and condemnation to work on your emotions
• Why walking in the Spirit (Galatians 5:16) is living from your new heart, not trying harder
• A key question to ask the Holy Spirit: What lie is leading me into this behavior?
• A guided prayer asking God to show you the lies about your worth, your value and your salvation so you can reject them and walk in the truth

Freedom starts when you live from forgiveness, because living from forgiveness is living from the truth.

Join us on Wednesday nights: Our weekly group coaching call is where men encourage each other, get teaching and grow in their identity in Christ. If you’d like to join, reach out. I’d love to work with you.

Freedom is your new normal.

What if your past was gone and tomorrow never showed up? How would you live today?

This week, Rich starts something new: three episodes in one week. He kicks it off with a story about Sir William Osler, the celebrated physician who said he wasn’t a genius at all. His secret was living in “day-tight compartments.” Osler borrowed the image from an ocean liner’s watertight bulkheads. Shut the iron doors on yesterday, shut them on tomorrow, and you’re safe for today.

Jesus taught it first: “Give us this day our daily bread.”

For men fighting for freedom from pornography, this changes everything. Guilt, condemnation, and shame drag yesterday’s mistakes into today. Anxiety pulls in fear of a future that hasn’t happened yet. Rich explains how to stop carrying both, and why the answer isn’t to fight your thoughts. You notice them, set your mind on what’s in front of you, and trust that God’s grace is enough for today.

In this episode:

• Osler’s famous Yale speech on day-tight compartments
• How “daily bread” teaches us to live one day at a time
• Why your mind is the only place your past mistakes still live
• What to do when your mind keeps offering guilt and fear: watch it, don’t wrestle it
• A closing prayer for today’s manna, no more and no less

Freedom is your new normal, one day at a time.

“For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7)

When life squeezes you, whatever is inside comes out. If you’ve been fighting porn by managing behavior (keeping your phone out of the bedroom, cutting out the doom scrolling), you’ve been working on the fruit and leaving the root alone. In this episode, Richard Young looks at Proverbs 23:7 and shows that the real battle is in what you believe about yourself.

The enemy is the father of lies, and every bad fruit in your life grows from a lie you’ve accepted as true. You might believe “I’m not worthy of love,” “I’m worthless,” or “I’m the sum of everything I’ve ever done.” Those lies hide in plain sight, and they keep you going back to porn to numb yourself. Richard explains how to find the lie, remove it, and replace it with the truth of what Jesus has already done for you.

In this episode:

• Why behavior was never your real problem
• The toothpaste principle: what comes out when you’re squeezed
• How to “put on your Sherlock hat” after a slip-up and trace it back to the thinking that caused it
• A two-step process: remove the lie, then meditate on the truth
• A prayer asking God to reveal the lie keeping you stuck

Freedom isn’t about trying harder. It starts with seeing yourself the way God sees you.

If you want to feel shame, live in the past. If you want to worry, live in the future. The only moment you actually have is this one, and it's the one most of us keep running away from.

In this episode of the Free From Porn podcast, Richard Young continues the series on Bible verses that lead to freedom. This time it's Psalm 118:24: "This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it."

Richard shares a simple practice that changed how he lives: doing the dishes to do the dishes, not just to get them done. He talks about how boredom and constant distraction (music, audiobooks, always reaching for the next thing) can quietly train us to escape our own lives. When life hits hard, that same habit sends us looking for relief in porn.

You'll hear a real story about a wrong address, a missed birthday party, and what happened when Richard chose to notice his frustration and feel it instead of numbing it.

In this episode:

• Why the present is the only moment that matters
• How distraction sets you up to relapse when your emotions shift
• The lie that a bad feeling will last forever
• How to notice, feel, and stay with hard emotions until they pass
• Brushing your teeth to brush them: bringing presence into ordinary moments
• A closing prayer to stop running and start living the day God has made

Don't be afraid of tomorrow. Don't be ashamed of yesterday. This is the day. Live it fully and give glory to God.

Have you ever slipped up after weeks of doing well and thought, "Well, all that was lost. I'm back at ground zero"? That's all-or-nothing thinking. It has kept a lot of men down who could have gotten back up.

In this episode, Richard Young looks at Proverbs 24:16: "For the righteous falls seven times and rises again, but the wicked stumble in times of calamity." It's the verse that broke a lot of things loose for him a few years ago. Scripture doesn't say the righteous never fall. It says they get back up.

In this episode:

• Why counting days and all-or-nothing thinking can hold you back
• Why quitting porn can feel harder at first: once you stop numbing, you have to face real life
• How to keep a growth mindset: noticing triggers, watching patterns, and learning to sit with urges instead of running from them
• A striking study about rats in water, and what it shows about the power of knowing help is coming
• Why you already have everything you need in Christ, right now

You're not too far gone. God loves you. He's teaching you, guiding you, and disciplining you as His son. If you slip, you don't have to stay down. The episode closes with a prayer to stand in that truth and refuse to give up.

Free From Porn: where freedom is your new normal.

This is a bonus episode of Free From Porn. This week's episode comes to you from our friends at the Death to Life podcast — we're sharing it here because Leif's story of secret shame, a hidden lust-driven double life, and ultimately gospel-centered freedom lines up exactly with what we talk about on this show. We think you'll be encouraged by it.

Leif Cano was used to living a double life. From an early exposure to pornography at just eight years old, Leif's relationship with God always had a tinge of guilt and shame. No matter how many stages he played on in his worship band, Leif saw everything through the lens of lust. That secret shame damaged more than just Leif — it seeped into his high school relationships, two marriages, and several bouts of infidelity. The worst part? He truly believed that was his nature, just an inevitability to sin.

But when Leif was at rock bottom and careening toward the end of his second marriage, God showed up in a powerful way. Through the Holy Spirit, Leif was led to freedom from addiction by God's perfect love and forgiveness. The truth of the Gospel transformed Leif's life — and it gets better from there. Listen to his whole story and be reminded of the Good News of what God has done at the cross, once for all!

Keywords: Secrets, Pornography, Addiction, Family, Marriage, Therapy, Infidelity, Music Ministry, New Life, Righteousness

Credit: Episode originally from the Death to Life podcast, shared here as a bonus episode.

You Don't Rise to Willpower, You Rise to Your Environment

Rich digs into Proverbs 4:14-15 — "Do not enter the path of the wicked... avoid it, do not go on it, turn away and pass on" — and makes a case that's easy to nod along to but hard to actually live out: most relapses aren't a willpower failure. They're an environment failure.

He walks through why the last few times you've slipped up probably looked eerily similar — same place, same trigger, same pattern — and why "just try harder next time" almost always runs out of gas. The fix isn't more grit. It's changing the conditions you keep putting yourself in.

Rich gets specific: the five people you surround yourself with, falling asleep scrolling your phone, using your bed for anything other than sleep (or intimacy, if married). Small environmental shifts that remove the setup for failure before willpower ever has to show up.

Two questions anchor the episode: What is it about my environment that leads to this? And what can I actually change?

In this episode:

• Why willpower always runs out — and what to build instead
• "You rise to the level of your environment, not your willpower"
• Practical environment shifts: phone habits, bedtime, who you surround yourself with
• Two questions to ask about your own patterns and slip-ups
• A prayer to ask God to reveal what needs to change

What does a friend's stage 3 breast cancer diagnosis have to do with breaking free from porn? Everything. In this episode, Rich shares a story from that same morning — a phone call, a prayer, and a firsthand look at what it means to "cash the check" God already wrote.

Digging into the Greek word sozo (salvation — meaning saved, healed, delivered, made whole, and kept safe) and Psalm 103, Rich makes the case that freedom from unwanted sexual behavior isn't something you're working toward — it's something you already have in Christ. You're not trying to break free. You're not trying to earn healing. You're learning to open your eyes and believe what's already true.

If shame has convinced you that freedom is always just out of reach, this episode will challenge you to stop striving and start believing — and closes with a prayer you can pray right where you are.