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Your phone buzzes: another behavior report. Learn why punishment fails ADHD kids and get scripts to build a real school-home team.

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It's 2:47 PM. Your phone buzzes. You already know what it is before you look. Behavior update. Today was difficult. Please discuss consequences at home. Your stomach drops—because this isn't information. It's a verdict.

Here's what no one tells you: There are three people drowning in that moment. Your child, who's overwhelmed and has no words for it. The teacher, who's exhausted and out of tools. And you, already hanging on by a thread, now expected to be the enforcer.

This episode is for that moment. Not the Pinterest version of ADHD support—the real one. Apryl breaks down why traditional classroom discipline fails ADHD brains and what actually works, backed by research and her decade of classroom experience.

You'll learn:

• Why taking away recess is one of the worst things you can do for an ADHD kid
• The one phrase that changes everything: "Praise the positive opposite"
• 3 research-aligned moves teachers can use in the moment of meltdown
• A word-for-word email script to send your child's teacher (without sounding like you're blaming)
• How to ask for a two-goal plan that both school and home can actually sustain
• The simple template that replaces behavior crime reports with trust-building communication
• Why ADHD kids change through in-the-moment support—not 8 PM lectures

After listening, you'll finally have language for what you've been feeling and a concrete plan to share with your child's school.

The Email Script for Parents

Ask for:

1. Please don't remove recess for behavior—movement helps them regulate
2. Can we pick two school goals only? (Example: raise hand during math, start work within 2 minutes)
3. Can we add one positive note daily, even one sentence?

Close with: "I'm not asking for perfection, just a plan we can both sustain."

The Template for Teachers

Replace behavior crime reports with:

• One win: He came back after a reset / helped a classmate / tried again
• Today's trigger: Transition from math to library
• What helped: Movement break / smaller task / private cue

RESOURCES MENTIONED

• Free Mini Course: Calm the Chaos: The ADHD Parent Reset — raisingadhd.org/calm

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ADHD kids hear "I'm the problem" on repeat. Learn why repairing after yelling rewrites that story—and what to do when your child won't engage.

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There's a sentence ADHD kids learn really early. They don't usually say it out loud, but they're living it internally: I'm the problem.

Not "that was hard." Not "that didn't go well." But something is wrong with me.

Here's what the research says: it's not the conflict that damages your relationship—it's the unrepaired conflict. And for kids with ADHD, who've already received thousands more corrections than their peers by elementary school, those unrepaired moments stack into an identity.

In part two of our repair series, we're going deeper into why repair matters so much for the ADHD brain—especially when rejection sensitivity makes yelling feel like proof they're unlovable.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• The critical difference between shame and guilt (and why it matters for ADHD)
• Why your child refuses to accept your apology (it's protection, not defiance)
• How to repair when your kid shuts down or says "I don't care"
• The nonverbal repairs that count just as much as words
• Language shifts that protect your child's identity
• Signs that your repair actually worked

Walk away knowing that every repair—even the ones your child doesn't respond to—becomes data they'll use to trust you again.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• The Shame vs. Guilt Distinction
• Why Kids Refuse Repair (3 Reasons)
• How to Repair When They Won't Engage
• Nonverbal Repairs That Count
• The Identity-Protecting Language Shift

Why This Matters for ADHD

By late elementary school, kids with ADHD have received thousands more negative corrections than their peers. These aren't neutral—they stack into an identity of "I am the problem." Consistent repair doesn't erase consequences; it changes the story from "I am bad" to "that was hard."

RESOURCES MENTIONED

• Free Mini Course: Calm the Chaos: The ADHD Parent Reset
• Related Episode: Part 1 – Stop Sitting in Mom Guilt: How to Repair with Your ADHD Child After You Lose It
• Related Episode: Why Small Things Trigger Big Meltdowns: How Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria Hijacks ADHD Brains
• Related Episode: When ADHD Anger Turns Destructive: Why Punishment Makes It Worse (And What Actually Works)

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Yelled at your ADHD child and feel awful? Learn the 5-step repair system that protects your child's self-esteem and actually strengthens your relationship.

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The explosion is over. The house is quiet. Your kid has disappeared into their room, and you're standing there with a pit in your stomach, replaying the look on their face and asking yourself the question no parenting book prepared you for: Am I ruining my kid?

Here's what you were never taught: the yelling isn't what damages the relationship. It's what happens—or doesn't happen—afterward.

In this episode, Apryl and Dr. Brian Bradford break down the neuroscience behind why your child can't "learn their lesson" during a blowup (spoiler: their thinking brain is literally offline), and walk you through the exact 5-step repair process that protects your child from developing a shame-based identity.

Because ADHD kids already hear thousands more corrections than their peers by elementary school. They don't need perfection from you. They need repair.

You'll learn:

• Why secure attachment is built through rupture AND repair—not by never messing up
• The brain science behind why consequences don't work when your child is dysregulated
• The 5-part repair system you can use tonight (with exact scripts)
• How to apologize without giving in on your boundaries
• The "do-over" technique for catching yourself before it escalates
• Why this one shift can change your child's internal story from "I'm bad" to "I'm learning"

If you've been carrying guilt about losing your temper, this episode will feel like someone finally handed you the missing manual.

RESOURCES MENTIONED

• Free course: "3-Second Calm Reset" at raisingadhd.org/calm
• Previous episode: When ADHD Anger Turns Destructive: Why Punishment Makes It Worse (And What Actually Works)
• ADHD Alien comic

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Destructive anger in ADHD kids is one of the most misunderstood, shame-loaded experiences parents face. The advice most families are given — harsher consequences, bigger punishments, “making it stop” — often makes these episodes happen more often, not less.

In this episode, Apryl and Dr. Brian walk through what’s actually happening in the ADHD brain during these moments — and the system that helps families stop the cycle without becoming permissive or powerless.

Thoughts parents have that this episode answers

• “If I don’t punish this hard, am I raising a future adult who can’t control themselves?”
• “Why does my kid destroy things over something so small?”
• “Nothing works — consequences, lectures, taking things away.”
• “Am I being too soft… or am I missing something?”

You’re not weak for asking those questions. You’re responding to a nervous system problem with tools that were never designed for ADHD brains.

What This Episode Walks You Through

1. Why logic disappears during ADHD anger explosions

• What’s happening in the amygdala vs. the prefrontal cortex
• Why reasoning, lecturing, and threats cannot work in the moment
• The difference between knowing better and being able to do better

2. The system that reduces destructive behavior over time

• How to interrupt explosions before they happen
• Why antecedents matter more than consequences
• The “positive opposite” strategy that teaches replacement behaviors

3. Consequences that teach — without escalating the fire

• Why harsh punishment increases aggression and dysregulation
• What accountability looks like for ADHD kids
• How small, boring, predictable consequences actually stick

4. How this changes for teenagers

• Why dignity, privacy, and agency matter more as kids get older
• How to collaborate instead of control
• What repair sounds like after the storm — without shaming

5. What teachers can do to prevent public blowups

• Simple classroom strategies that protect regulation and self-esteem
• How to intervene quietly before the explosion
• Why predictability lowers threat for ADHD students

Why this approach works when others fail

Most parenting advice treats explosive anger as a behavior problem.
This episode treats it as a nervous system overload — and responds with strategies that work with ADHD brains instead of against them.

This isn’t permissive parenting.
It isn’t “being soft.”
It’s strategic, research-aligned, and focused on building skills your child will carry into adulthood.

Want to go deeper?

• Share this episode with a partner, teacher, or caregiver who needs the full picture
• Subscribe so you don’t miss the next episode on repairing after blowups
• Leave a review — it helps other ADHD families find support that actually helps

You’re not failing.
You’re learning a different way to lead — because you have a different kid.

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This is the holiday episode every ADHD parent needs.
After five weeks of dismantling holiday myths, decoding meltdowns, and rebuilding your confidence piece-by-piece…we’re finally here.

In this episode of Raising ADHD, Apryl (former teacher + ADHD mom) and Dr. Brian Bradford (child & adolescent psychiatrist) reveal the complete, step-by-step ADHD Holiday Survival System — the exact 3-phase plan that helps your child stay regulated, reduces sensory overload, prevents RSD spirals, and finally lets your family enjoy the holidays again.

If you’ve ever thought:

• “Why do the holidays always end in tears?”
• “Why does my ADHD child fall apart at family gatherings?”
• “Why is the week after Christmas the hardest week of the year?”
• “Why does my kid get overstimulated so fast — and how do I help?”

…this episode is your roadmap back to calm, connection, and actual joy.

🎄 What You’ll Learn (and Why It Works for ADHD Brains)

PHASE 1 — The Setup (Outsourcing Executive Function Before the Holidays Even Start)

✔ The Visual Preview Strategy that solves ADHD time blindness
✔ The No-Surprises Gift Rule that prevents meltdowns and RSD
✔ The Body-Doubling Wrapping Method that eliminates last-minute stress
✔ Why neurodivergent families need predictability, not “magic”
✔ How ADHD adults benefit from these same tools too

PHASE 2 — The Event (Regulating Sensory + Social Load in Real Time)

✔ How to create a Sensory Safe Zone before you even walk in the door
✔ What belongs in your ADHD Regulation Kit
✔ The Two-Car Rule that stops the “I’m trapped here” panic spiral
✔ Social Scripts to avoid overexplaining, awkwardness, or unsolicited advice
✔ The Dopamine Menu that stabilizes mood + behavior without restricting joy

These strategies don’t just help your child stay regulated — they help YOU stay regulated, which makes the whole day smoother.

PHASE 3 — The Landing (Preventing the Dopamine Crash After the Holidays)

✔ Why the post-holiday crash is biological, not behavioral
✔ The Buffer Day Rule that protects your family’s nervous system
✔ Why every ADHD family needs a Bridge Event 2–3 weeks after Christmas
✔ How to rebuild joy through connection, not perfection
✔ “Good Enough Traditions” that reduce overwhelm and increase bonding

This phase alone will change your January.

🌟 Why This Episode Matters

The holidays were built for neurotypical brains — not ADHD ones.
If you’ve ever felt like you were failing…you weren’t.

The system was failing you.

But with the right structure, sensory strategies, and dopamine-aware planning, your holidays can go from barely surviving to:

• peaceful mornings
• fewer meltdowns
• more connection
• actual joy

…for both you and your ADHD kiddo.

🔗 FREE Holiday Survival PDF (Your Step-By-Step Plan)

Grab the full holiday system as a printable PDF:
👉 raisingadhd.org/holiday

🎙️ Have a Question You Want Us to Answer on the Show?

Submit it here and we may feature it in an upcoming episode:
👉 raisingadhd.org/question

❤️ If This Episode Helped You…

The best gift you can give us this season is:

• leaving a review
• tapping subscribe
• sharing this with another parent or teacher who needs it

Your support helps more families find the ADHD clarity they’ve been searching for.

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There’s a moment every ADHD parent remembers.
Not the big, Instagram-perfect one — the small, quiet one.

It’s the moment you realize:
“Wait… this actually worked.”

The morning didn’t explode.
The meltdown didn’t happen.
Your kid didn’t spiral at the holiday party.
For a few seconds, your home felt calm — and you almost didn’t believe it.

This episode of Raising ADHD is about that moment.
The wins.
The proof that small changes create big transformations, especially during the holidays.

Welcome to Episode 4 of our Holiday Series — the episode where everything finally clicks.

✨ What This Episode Covers (and Why It Matters)

After learning the ADHD Holiday Paradox (Ep 1), the 10-Minute Reset (Ep 2), and the myths sabotaging your season (Ep 3)…
today we show you how the wins start showing up — in mornings, sensory overwhelm, boundaries, and emotional regulation.

These are the changes you’ll begin to see when your child’s brain finally gets:

✔ structure
✔ sensory safety
✔ predictable rhythms
✔ boundaries that protect everyone

Let’s break down the four biggest wins ADHD families experience during the holidays.

🎁 WIN #1 — Morning Peace (The Everyday Anchor That Changes Everything)

Mornings are the pressure cooker of ADHD households — fast, frantic, and full of cortisol spikes.
But one small daily anchor (“the first thing we always do”) can completely change the tone of the day.

You’ll learn:

• How predictable anchors wake up the “CEO of the brain”
• Why fewer surprises = fewer tears, fewer shoe-hunting disasters
• How small pockets of calm compound into full-day emotional stability

This win is tiny but powerful — and it shows up almost immediately.

🎄 WIN #2 — Sensory Safety (Not Eliminating Noise, But Containing It)

Holiday events are sensory landmines: noise, scents, lights, unpredictable social chaos.

But simple sensory supports — noise-canceling headphones, sunglasses, a 5-minute car break — create an instant shift.

Here’s what parents start seeing:

• Fewer meltdowns
• Fewer shutdowns
• Longer participation at gatherings
• Less “walking on eggshells”
• A calmer, more stable nervous system

Research shows these micro-interventions directly reduce dysregulation in ADHD kids.
Your child feels the difference right away.

🌟 WIN #3 — Boundaries (The Quiet Hero of ADHD Holiday Success)

This is the win that sneaks up on families — and transforms everything.

You’ll learn why boundaries like:

• Leaving the event 30 minutes early
• Protecting bedtime
• Saying no to one overwhelming tradition
• Letting go of the Pinterest-perfect holiday

…create immediate relief, reduce resentment, and protect emotional energy for everyone.

When families set even one boundary, the holidays shift from:

Barely surviving → Actually enjoyable

And teachers feel this too — because regulated kids return to school calmer, steadier, and less overwhelmed.

💛 WIN #4 — Emotional Regulation Returns (The Surprise Win Parents Never Expect)

When structure comes back, sensory overload reduces, and boundaries protect the home…
You start to see:

• fewer emotional crashes
• faster recoveries
• more flexibility
• more composure
• fewer explosive responses

This is the win that brings parents to tears — because when the noise settles and the chaos stops…

✨ you finally enjoy your child again.

This is the heart of the entire holiday series.

🎧 NEXT WEEK: The Full ADHD Holiday Survival Pla

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If your holidays feel louder, harder, and more meltdown-heavy than everyone else’s, there’s a reason — and it’s not your parenting.
It’s the three myths you were taught to believe about ADHD and the holidays.

In this episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on the well-intentioned advice that’s been making December nearly impossible for ADHD kids (and the adults raising them). These myths feel comforting, logical, even wholesome — but the neuroscience tells a very different story.

And once you hear the truth?
Your entire holiday season will make sense in a way it never has before.

🎧 In this episode, we reveal:

1️⃣ The sugar myth that’s fooled parents for decades

You’ll learn why research shows sugar is not causing the chaos — and what is driving your child’s post-party explosions (hint: it’s something far more surprising and much easier to fix).

2️⃣ The “holiday break reset” myth that quietly destroys regulation

We explain why unstructured days don’t recharge ADHD kids — they destabilize them.
This is the reason your child is more explosive after break, not refreshed.

3️⃣ The medication myth that hurts families every December

We walk through the outdated advice that still circulates among parents, teachers, and even some clinicians — and the neuroscience that proves why skipping ADHD meds during the holidays makes everything harder.

These aren’t opinions.
These aren’t parenting hacks.
These are clinical patterns Brian sees every year, research-backed truths, and the brain science that finally helps everything click.

If you’ve ever looked at your child during the holidays and thought:

“Why is this so much harder for us than it is for other families?”
“What am I missing?”
“Why does everyone promise the break will help — but it just makes things worse?”

This episode gives you the answers no one else is saying out loud.

You’ll walk away with a completely new understanding of your child’s brain, why December overwhelms them so intensely, and what you can put in place today to make the holidays calmer — for both of you.

• Your child isn’t melting down because of sugar.
  It’s excitement + sensory overload + adrenaline — not cupcakes.
• Your child doesn’t thrive in wide-open free time.
  Their brain needs scaffolding, even during holidays, to stay regulated.
• Your child doesn’t need a “break” from medication.
  ADHD doesn’t turn off when school closes — and neither does the need for emotional support.

These three shifts alone can transform the entire season.

• Research on sugar + hyperactivity
• Insights from the International ADHD Conference
• Apryl’s favorite coloring tablecloths for calm holiday mornings → http://creativecrayonsworkshop.com/color with code COLOR

Please make sure you:

• Follow the show
• Leave a review — this truly helps ADHD families find trustworthy support
• Share this episode with a parent, teacher, or therapist who needs the truth (not myths)

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If “holiday magic” currently looks more like meltdowns over socks, cold coffee, and pure morning chaos, you’re not doing anything wrong, you’re living inside the ADHD Holiday Paradox.

In today’s episode, we're revealing the fastest way to bring calm back into your home, a simple, science-backed 10-Minute Holiday Reset that lowers emotional reactivity, rebuilds structure, and gives your family the breathing room you desperately need right now.

And teachers, you’re part of this too. Stick around for the quick classroom-calming notes near the end.

🎧 IN THIS EPISODE, YOU’LL LEARN:

🔥 Why ADHD brains unravel faster during the holidays
Their sensory systems take in everything, all at once.

🔥 The “anchor activity” that instantly calms an ADHD household
And why it works from home, hotels, grandma’s house… anywhere.

🔥 How 10 minutes can reset the entire day
The prefrontal-cortex science behind why this simple rhythm works.

🔥 What sensory + emotional shielding looks like in real life
Including why meltdowns aren’t defiance — they’re survival.

🔥 Why it’s okay to say no to “perfect holiday traditions”
And how boundary scripts protect everyone’s energy.

🔥 A quick teacher tip to survive the pre-break chaos
(Because the whole classroom feels ADHD-ish right now.)

✨ COMING NEXT WEEK

We’re busting the 3 biggest ADHD holiday myths that keep families stuck in guilt, chaos, and emotional noise.

Hit FOLLOW now so the episode lands straight in your app.

📩 HAVE A QUESTION FOR US?

We’d love to hear from you!
DM us on Instagram at @raisingadhd_org — your question might be featured in a future episode.
Or you might even join us as a guest.

And if this episode gave you even one “oh my gosh, that’s us” moment…
the best Christmas gift you can give us is a quick rating + review.

🎨 HOLIDAY TIP: WANT A CALMER TABLE THIS YEAR?

Before we dive in, Apryl shares one of her favorite holiday sanity-savers:

👉 Creative Crayons Workshop coloring tablecloths
Kids stay busy. You get a few quiet minutes. Everyone wins.

You can grab 20% off your order here:
https://creativecrayonsworkshop.com/color

Use code: COLOR

They even personalize them for birthdays and holiday themes — truly a magical reset tool.