A room full of uniforms. A visitation line where strangers know stories you’ve never heard. Dakota takes us into the disorienting days after her dad's suicide ,a state trooper, and the long, uneven path that followed.

We walk through the crowded rituals of grief and the quiet that follows. Dakota shares how plans to fight wildfires collapsed under the weight of mental health, and how she found new footing through the discipline of taxidermy, the challenge of falconry, and the living history of World War II reenacting. Along the way, horses become a steady mirror: they test confidence, reward clarity, and invite presence without pretense.

This conversation also reaches every first responder, veteran, and parent wrestling with the lie that distance protects your family. We talk openly about isolation, shame, and the ripple effects on children who still want your time, even when life is messy. Faith runs through the episode as a quiet strength, not a shortcut; an invitation to move from monologue to dialogue, to ask for help, and to model vulnerability that breaks generational patterns.

If you’ve ever wondered how to show up when you feel unworthy or how to heal when you’re angry at the past, this story offers both empathy and a way forward. Listen, share with someone who needs hope, and if this hits home, subscribe and leave a review so others can find it. Your presence matters more than your perfection.

If you or someone you know is in crisis and at risk of self-harm, please call or text 988, the suicide and crisis lifeline.

To contact us directly send an email to Dan@10-42project.org or call 515-350-6274
Visit our website! 10-42project.org
Check us out on social media!
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A quiet ranch, a heavy truth, and a voice brave enough to carry both. Lindy returns to share the story of her husband Jeff—a state trooper, a protector, and a man undone by untreated PTSD—and how a culture of silence can turn pain into catastrophe. We walk through the slow burn of cumulative trauma: first-on-scene moments that never leave, sleep that never restores, and the fear that asking for help will cost a badge. The conversation is raw but guided by purpose: surface the signs, remove the shame, and make room for action.

Lindy recounts the night everything changed with heartbreaking clarity—control, speed, fragmented questions, and then the words “It’s too late for that.”

If you’re a firefighter, officer, EMT, or dispatcher sitting in silence, hear this without varnish: the world is not better without you. Therapy is wisdom, not weakness. Faith can anchor you, but you also need peers and professionals who normalize help. We close with hope—stories like Lindy’s can change culture.

If this conversation resonates, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help others find these lifelines. And if you need a voice on the other end, reach out. We will call you back.

If you or someone you know is in crisis and at risk of self-harm, please call or text 988, the suicide and crisis lifeline.

To contact us directly send an email to Dan@10-42project.org or call 515-350-6274
Visit our website! 10-42project.org
Check us out on social media!
Youtube: @1042project
Facebook: www.facebook.com/1042project
Instagram: 1042_project

Bright skies at the ranch set a sharp contrast to the truth we explore with guest Lindy Brown: the weight a first responder carries doesn’t stay at work. Lindy is the widow of an Iowa State Trooper who died by suicide. She shares why she felt called to speak, how a five-year slow burn of trauma changed her husband, and what families see long before reports or discipline ever show up. We talk openly about the nights that never end, the way alcohol masks pain, and the moment a prom night scuffle became a desperate signal that no one knew how to read.

I open up about my own spiral—pain pills, vodka, suicidal plans—and the lie that strength means silence. Together we break down what hypervigilance looks like at home, why small conflicts can spark explosive reactions, and how culture can unintentionally punish honesty. We dig into leadership responses, the hollow comfort of “leave it at the door,” and the reality that counseling offered without trust is counseling refused. Lindy explains how one horrific call—collecting the remains of a man struck by a semi in a storm—etched itself into Jeff’s mind. No academy prepares you for a five-gallon bucket and picking up human body parts.

This conversation isn’t about blame; it’s about building something better. If you’re a first responder, a spouse, or a leader, you’ll hear practical insight, lived experience, and a clear path toward safer, braver conversations. Hit play, share it with someone who needs to hear it, and if this resonates, subscribe and leave a review so more families can find real help.

If you or someone you know is in crisis and at risk of self-harm, please call or text 988, the suicide and crisis lifeline.

To contact us directly send an email to Dan@10-42project.org or call 515-350-6274
Visit our website! 10-42project.org
Check us out on social media!
Youtube: @1042project
Facebook: www.facebook.com/1042project
Instagram: 1042_project