Send us Fan Mail

In Episode 4 of Shay Unfiltered, “The Grocery Store Analogy”, Shay and Ryan celebrate their anniversary with plenty of laughs, a recap of their beach getaway to Madeira Beach and John’s Pass, and the tragic story of a chocolate-covered frozen key lime pie that never stood a chance.

Then things get unfiltered.

Shay and Ryan introduce their “grocery store analogy” to tackle a difficult question: What happens when affection, sex, and intimacy slowly disappear from a relationship? They discuss how repeated rejection can leave a partner feeling unwanted and disconnected, and why a lack of intimacy can sometimes lead to “window shopping,” including pornography or seeking attention elsewhere. They make one thing clear: cheating isn’t justified. But ignoring the problems that create distance between partners doesn’t fix them either.

The conversation dives into accountability on both sides, the difference between simply saying “no” and communicating what’s actually going on, and why showing desire doesn’t always have to lead to sex. Sometimes a touch, a kiss, flirting, or simply reassuring your partner that they’re still wanted can make a major difference.

Shay and Ryan also discuss how easily kids, phones, responsibilities, exhaustion, and everyday life can push a relationship to the bottom of the priority list. Their message is simple: don’t stop dating, touching, communicating with, and choosing your partner just because life gets busy.

It’s an anniversary episode filled with laughs, uncomfortable truths, and a grocery store analogy you probably won’t forget.

Send us Fan Mail

In Episode 3 of Shay Unfiltered, “Let Men Be Men,” Shay and her fiancé Ryan tackle relationship roles, control, trust, and what can happen when one partner feels like they have to manage everything.

Shay opens up about her own experience of constantly carrying the mental load, from budgeting and paying bills to making household decisions, and how learning to give up some of that control changed their relationship. When Ryan took over their finances, Shay found herself feeling less anxious and overwhelmed, while Ryan felt trusted and motivated to take more responsibility and lead.

Drawing from lessons in Laura Doyle’s The Surrendered Wife and their own relationship, Shay and Ryan discuss how nagging, criticism, correcting, and constantly telling your partner how or when something should be done can slowly create resentment. They break down how seemingly insignificant arguments over dishes, toilet paper, driving, chores, or the “right” way to do something can eventually damage communication, attraction, and intimacy.

They also explore the difference between expressing what you want and trying to control how your partner delivers it. The episode challenges listeners to examine their own tone, expectations, and behavior and ask whether they’re giving their partner the trust, respect, and space they expect in return.

Sometimes strengthening a relationship isn’t about doing more. It’s about knowing when to stop controlling, start trusting, and let men be men.

Send us Fan Mail

In Episode 2 of Shay Unfiltered, Shay and her fiancé Ryan dive into one of the most overlooked conversations in relationships: the difference between physical intimacy and genuine connection. They discuss what they call "grapey sex"—when someone agrees to intimacy without truly wanting to be there—and why an honest "no" is far healthier than a reluctant "yes." For them, intimacy is about feeling desired, emotionally connected, and fully present with your partner.

The conversation expands into practical ways couples can reignite the spark by dating their spouse again, flirting intentionally, trying each other's hobbies, and spending quality time together through everyday activities. Shay and Ryan also emphasize the importance of open, judgment-free communication about desires, boundaries, fantasies, and preferences. From conversation starters and question cards to playful texting, lingerie, and other ways to keep things exciting, they share ideas to help couples strengthen both their emotional and physical connection.

Whether you're trying to reconnect, improve communication, or deepen intimacy, this episode offers honest conversations and practical advice to help bring you and your partner closer together.