Together, Toni and Alison explore attachment wounds, trauma, control, nervous-system responses, relationships, faith and what it actually looks like to become secure from the inside out.

Toni vulnerably shares about experiencing sexual abuse at 13 years old and how the lack of safety surrounding that experience shaped her relationship with control, men and her own body for years afterward.

Alison explains why the parts of us that become controlling, perfectionistic, avoidant, hyper-independent or people-pleasing are often not trying to hurt us.

They’re trying to protect us.

The strategies may no longer be helpful—but shame isn’t the answer.

Curiosity, compassion, healing and connection are.

They also unpack what attachment actually means and why experiences of love, safety and trust are often encoded in our bodies long before we have language for them.

But our childhood experiences are not the end of the story.

Alison introduces the concept of earned security—the reality that adults can learn secure attachment through healthy relationships, self-awareness, connection with God and experiences of rupture and repair.

Toni also shares a recent dating experience that revealed something deeply healing: trusting yourself might sometimes mean recognizing that you’re simply not ready yet.

And instead of shaming that reality, you can honor it.

The conversation even explores the relationship between play and safety—why being able to rest, laugh, dance or enjoy life without producing something may reveal that our bodies finally feel safe enough to let go.

If you have experienced betrayal, struggle to trust people, feel overly controlling, constantly work to feel safe, or wonder why your body reacts so strongly even when your mind knows you’re okay, this episode is for you.

Grab Dr. Alison Cook’s new book The Secure Soul through this link: https://link.amazon/B094oHUMJ

And if the Still Coloring Podcast has encouraged you, consider supporting Toni through the donation link in the show notes as she continues building the show while raising her kids as a single mom.

Watch the full episode on YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and share it with someone learning how to feel safe again.

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu

This conversation is not just for married couples.

It’s for anyone navigating dating, friendship, family, parenting, betrayal, sisterhood or learning how to trust again.

Debra explains why healthy relationships aren’t something we simply find—they’re something we intentionally build.

Together, Toni and Debra unpack the four seasons relationships move through: spring, summer, fall and winter—and why recognizing the season you’re in can give you hope and practical direction instead of assuming that a difficult season means the relationship is doomed.

They also talk about:

How childhood wounds and family-of-origin patterns follow us into adult relationships.

Why some of us become “rescuers” who consistently give too much.

How relationships become mirrors that expose places in us that still need healing.

Why vulnerability cannot be demanded through criticism.

And the difference between communicating a need and pointing out somebody else’s deficit.

Debra gives one especially practical reminder:

Saying, “I feel like you don’t care about me” isn’t actually sharing a feeling—it’s making an accusation.

Instead, learning to identify and communicate the real need underneath our frustration can completely change the way another person receives us.

Toni also opens up about navigating betrayal in her former marriage and why living in a false reality kept her from confronting what was actually happening.

Finally, Debra speaks directly to anyone whose past pain is affecting present relationships.

Healing doesn’t require forgetting what happened.

It allows us to stop viewing every new relationship through the lens of the person who hurt us before.

Because:

The work of healing is hard—but living unhealed is harder.

Grab Debra’s new book Relationship Skills: The Four Seasons That Will Make or Break Your Love Life through this link: https://link.amazon/B07B54BoA

If Still Coloring has helped you, consider supporting Toni and the podcast through the donation link in the show notes as she continues building the show while raising her kids as a single mom.

Watch the full conversation at YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and send this episode to someone you want to build a healthier relationship with.

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu

What does kindness look like when it actually costs you something?

On this solo episode of the Still Coloring Podcast, Toni dives into Luke 5:17–25 and the story of four friends who carried a paralyzed man to Jesus—and refused to let a crowded room stop them.

They believed.

They sacrificed.

They were determined.

And they had enough faith to carry somebody who may not have had enough strength to carry himself.

Toni unpacks what their story teaches us about sacrificial kindness, friendship, generosity, faith, and becoming the kind of person God can trust with His people.

Because kindness isn’t just saying something nice.

Sometimes kindness costs your time.

Your strength.

Your money.

Your comfort.

Your pride.

And sometimes it means showing up for someone who can’t give you anything in return.

Toni also challenges us with a simple truth:

If you want good friends, you need to be one.

And Jesus’ instruction in Matthew 10 gives us the blueprint:

Give as freely as you have received.

The love you’ve received—give it.

The forgiveness you’ve received—give it.

The kindness Jesus has shown you—go give it away.

🌱 JOIN THE 21-DAY DO GOOD CHALLENGE

Still Coloring is partnering with Orchard, and hundreds of you have already downloaded the FREE Seeds by Orchard app.

Beginning November 1, Toni and the Still Coloring community are spending 21 days intentionally doing good—one simple act of kindness at a time.

Download the Seeds by Orchard app through the link in the show notes and join us.

And if the Still Coloring Podcast has encouraged you, consider supporting Toni through the donation link in the show notes as she continues building the podcast while raising her kids as a single mom.

Watch the full episode at YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and send it to the friend who has carried you through something you could not have carried alone.

Let’s plant some seeds. 🌱

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu

Tori shares the story behind her new book Safe House and introduces us to Tanya—the woman who welcomed Tori during some of the hardest moments of her childhood, gave her somewhere to live after she aged out of foster care, and still keeps a key available so Tori always has a safe place to land.

Together, Toni and Tori unpack why hospitality is about so much more than opening your home.

It’s about access and presence.

Listening well.

Building trust.

Making room.

And being willing to love people closely enough that it actually costs you something.

Toni also gets vulnerable about overcoming her own fear of opening her home and what she is learning through hosting a small group for single moms around her table.

This conversation asks all of us a challenging question:

Do people experience the welcome of Jesus when they experience us?

Pre-order Tori’s new book Safe House here:

https://amzn.to/4jjWH65

And if the Still Coloring Podcast has encouraged you, consider supporting the show through the donation link in the show notes as Toni continues building the podcast while raising her kids as a single mom.

Watch the full conversation at YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and share this episode with someone who wants to become a safer, more present, more Jesus-like person.

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu

What does it actually look like to keep going when you’re tired enough to quit?

In this episode of the Still Coloring Podcast, Toni sits down with author and friend Kaitlin Chappell Rogers for a vulnerable, practical conversation about perseverance, failure, burnout, motherhood, rejection, obedience, spiritual warfare, and learning how to take life one next step at a time.

Kaitlin shares the winding journey from broadcast journalism to writing, the dreams God asked her to surrender, and how some of the fruit she prayed for took nearly a decade to see.

She also opens up about one of the darkest seasons of her life and the reality that perseverance does not always look strong or impressive.

Sometimes it looks like finding one reason to stay for one more day.

Toni gets vulnerable about her own fear of failure and how that fear can sometimes keep us from even starting the things God has called us to do.

Together, they unpack the idea of everyday perseverance:

You do not have to solve your whole life today.

You do not have to carry tomorrow today.

You do not have to eat the whole elephant.

Sometimes you just need to ask:

“God, what is the next right thing?”

And then ask Him for the grace to do that.

One of the most powerful reminders from this conversation is simple:

Crawling still counts.

If you are exhausted, burned out, scared to fail, grieving, overwhelmed, or wondering if you have enough left to keep going, this episode is for you.

Grab Kaitlin’s new book She Just Won’t Quit: Embracing the Practice of Everyday Perseverance here:

https://amzn.to/4j66UDe

And if the Still Coloring Podcast has encouraged you, consider supporting the show through the donation link in the show notes as Toni continues building the podcast while raising her kids as a single mom.

Watch the full episode on YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and share it with someone who needs the reminder that they do not have to do everything today.

They just need the next right step.

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu

What happens when your life looks nothing like the plan?

On this episode of the Still Coloring Podcast, Toni sits down with Mac & Kenz, founders of Delight Ministries and authors of This Wasn’t the Plan, for a vulnerable conversation about feeling stuck, disappointment with God, unanswered prayer, surrender, sin, faith, and what it looks like to keep moving when God does not change your circumstances the way you hoped.

Kenz shares about years of chronic illness and the spiritual crisis that came when she prayed for healing but her symptoms remained. What eventually changed wasn’t immediately her body—it was how she understood God’s presence in her pain.

Mac opens up about reaching a point where life looked incredible externally while internally she felt deeply empty and lonely, eventually moving back into her parents’ basement with no plan for what came next.

Together, they unpack a practical framework from Matthew 7:7:

Ask. Seek. Knock.

Ask Jesus better questions.

Seek evidence of His faithfulness.

And then knock—take the next brave step and trust Him with the door.

They also talk about the hidden places of sin and shame we desperately try to keep locked away from Jesus. Toni shares vulnerably about her own battle with pornography and lust and how inviting God and trusted community into that hidden room became part of her freedom.

If you’ve been thinking:

“God, this wasn’t the plan…”

this conversation is for you.

Grab Mac & Kenz’s new book This Wasn’t the Plan on Amazon through this link: https://amzn.to/4hlmaL2

And if the Still Coloring Podcast has encouraged you, consider supporting the show through the donation link in the show notes as Toni continues building the podcast while raising her kids as a single mom.

Watch the full episode at YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and send it to someone who needs a reminder that feeling stuck does not mean God has stopped moving.

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu

How do you keep your joy when life keeps giving you reasons to lose it?

On this episode of the Still Coloring Podcast, Toni sits down with Air1’s Lacy Abercrombie for a hilarious and deeply vulnerable conversation about what they call “sticky joy”—the kind of joy that can exist alongside grief, disappointment, addiction, and pain.

Lacy shares her journey from people-pleasing and searching for identity in other people to discovering who she was through actually following Jesus.

She also gets vulnerable about addiction, losing her ministry job, hiding from accountability, becoming dependent on alcohol, and the moment God used another woman’s obedience to help lead her toward sobriety.

Toni shares her own experience of turning to alcohol after divorce and realizing that something she used for temporary relief had slowly become an idol.

Then the conversation shifts into grief as Lacy shares about losing her brother DJ to addiction, seeing him days before his death, and singing “Goodness of God” at his funeral.

Together they wrestle with a hard question:

How can God still be good when life still hurts?

This conversation is a reminder that joy does not require denial.

Sometimes joy looks like finding one thing to hold onto today.

A Scripture.

A prayer.

A friend.

A worship song.

Or simply:

“Jesus, help me.”

If you’re grieving, fighting an unhealthy pattern, rebuilding your faith, or wondering why following Jesus hasn’t suddenly made life easier, this episode is for you.

Watch the full conversation on YouTube.com/@tonijcollier and send it to someone who needs a little sticky joy today.

AND watch Lacy's new YouTube show "Lacy's Lunch Table" with Elevation Rhythm here: https://tinyurl.com/4jhpr5rb

Watch podcast episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tonijcollier

Support the Still Coloring Podcast: https://square.link/u/u2FkAzC7?src=sheet

Shop Toni's merch: https://www.shopetch.co/collections/toni-collier

Connect with Toni:
Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tonijcollier
Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stillcoloringpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/colliertoni
Newsletter: ToniJCollier.com/Newsletter
Website: ToniJCollier.com

Purchase Toni's newest book, Don’t Try This Alone: https://amzn.to/3BQqaBr
Purchase Toni’s children’s book, Broken Crayons Still Color: https://amzn.to/3x3I4xD
Purchase Toni’s first book, Brave Enough to be Broken: https://amzn.to/3VoCjVu