After finding Jason's body, I went into a deep state of shock and stayed there for weeks. I was in such disbelief of what I was experiencing emotionally, physically, and mentally that almost immediately, I began documenting my journey, capturing my grief through video and audio recordings.

Join me as I share my documented journey as a suicide loss survivor. It’s intimately candid—a raw view of my journey, all the tears and countless cross-examinations, the 1 step forward to the 22+ steps backwards, the triumphs, the stumbles, the self-reflection—embracing the collateral beauty of the path I’ve trekked while healing and growing along the way✨❤️🌊

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #BeingTheWave #BeTheWave

#Healing #SelfLove #SuicideLossDocumentedJourney #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivor #InLovingHonor #SuicideLossPodcast

In this episode, join me as I dive into the whirlwind of emotions that erupted after the Findlay Jason. I'm opening my soul to share an unfiltered glimpse of my journey—a journey lined with anguish, self-reflection, and growth.

This episode isn't just about the darkness; it's about finding the glimmers of light amidst the haze. As we peel back the layers of grief, we'll reflect together on the raw truths of loss, the steps forward, the backward slides, and the moments of unexpected joy and healing.

Throughout this episode, we'll honor Jason's legacy and the countless others just like him—military members who have silently battled inner demons. Let this be an ode to their memory and a call to cherish impermanence, living life's moments with heartfelt presence.

Step into this story with an open heart and feel the profound beauty that emerges in the act of being present, embracing self-love, and witnessing the Light Being Found in the shadows.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Mentions -

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #Milicide #Lovespasms

Hi beautiful souls. In this episode of my journey, I open up about navigating life after a profound loss, sharing my struggles and triumphs as a suicide loss survivor. I dive into the whirlwind of emotions, from initial panic attacks to finding solace in simple daily walks with my dog. Through documenting my story, I hope to connect and show that while grief is intensely personal, you are never alone. Join me as we explore this path together, learning to breathe, love, and find light again.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Mentions:

Gottman Institute Summit: https://www.pesi.com/store/detail/15405/the-2015-summit-emotions-trauma-dbt-integrating-research

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

Handles

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #GottmanInstitute

Welcome back to *Light Being Found*! In Season 1, Episode 3, I'm diving deep into my journey as a suicide loss survivor, navigating the emotional waves of grief and healing. Join me as I revisit my past recordings for the first time, reflecting on precious memories of my love, Jason, who served in the US Army. I'm sharing the highs and lows, and those unexpected glimmers of light. From waking up with swollen eyes that somehow still make me smile, to finding solace in espresso rituals. Together, let’s explore the profound impact of loss, the music that connects us, and the importance of being gentle with ourselves during this journey.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Resources/Mentions

TAPS: https://www.taps.org

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

Handles

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #TAPS

The Beginning: Realizations and Raw Footage

Welcome back to Season 1, Episode 4—a pivotal episode for me. It's the first time I sat down at a computer to intentionally record my thoughts, unlike the impromptu phone recordings that came before. The realization struck me: "I have to record this. This is so wild. Whoa.”

This moment marked a commitment to documenting this journey regularly, a decision that would bring a sense of structure, processing, growth and reflection amidst the internal struggle.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Mentions

FB Groups:

Suicide Survivors Loss & Support: | https://www.facebook.com/groups/356093358111979/Suicide Grief Support: | https://www.facebook.com/groups/283667218320416/

Suicide Loss Of A Loved One: | https://www.facebook.com/groups/SuicideSurvivorsleftbehind/

Suicide Loss Survivor Grief Support Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/SuicideSurvivors.info/

Survivors of Suicide (Loss): | https://www.facebook.com/groups/survivorsofsuicide/

Smaller Group:

Hope After Suicide Loss—Spouse/Partner Loss: | https://www.facebook.com/groups/hopeaftersuicideloss.spousepartnerloss/

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

Handles

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #TAPS

n this heartfelt episode, I open up about my journey as a suicide loss survivor, exploring the emotional landscape of moving from darkness to discovering light. I dive into the layers of grief, sharing raw, unfiltered moments as I process my experiences and memories of my partner, Jason. This journey includes the comforting sounds of Jai's paws following me around and Dojah's meows, both comforting and stirring memories. Throughout, I reflect on the brokenness that adds beauty to my life’s tapestry and offer soul soothing hugs and encouragement for anyone on a similar path. Join me as I navigate the complex feelings of healing, love, and loss in today's episode.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Mentions - none

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

Handles

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #Milicide #Lovespasms

n this episode of Light Being Found, I share a deeply personal journey through my experiences as a suicide loss survivor. I reflect on the paralyzing moments of grief, the importance of capturing memories through video and voice, and the comfort they bring. I also discuss the artwork for my podcast, its special meaning, and Jason's story, highlighting his time in the military and our cherished memories together. Join me in exploring the emotions, the journey through trauma recovery, and the light that begins to emerge as we embrace our pain and memories. Let's navigate this path together with love and healing.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Mentions -

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #Milicide #Lovespasms #PoliticalWar

In today's episode of "Light Being Found," I delve into the concept of secondary loss following the death of my partner, Jason. We explore how these losses manifest in layers, affecting everything from future dreams to daily routines. I share the importance of gentle self-reflection and embracing grief, inspired by a profound Rumi quote on surrender. Join me as I honor love through cherished memories and find beauty in vulnerability. I invite you to share your thoughts and stories. I send you all love, light, and healing on your journey. Big Hugs.

Suicide Loss Survivor heart ❤️ Documented Journey: Podcast

Instagram @LightBeingFound www.instagram.com/lightbeingfound/

******COMING SOON*****

*Connect w/ me one on one | LightBeingFound.com

*Access Documented Journey | FindingTheLight.com

*All Things Podcast | SuicideLoss.online

Podcast Mentions -

Mental Health Disclaimer ❤️

Sharing my journey & stories is presented solely for informational & entertainment purposes. As someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, it's normal to feel a range of emotions, including grief and guilt. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek support. Take care of yourself and know you're not alone. Sending you so much love, light, and healing as you navigate your journey.

#FindingTheLight #LightBeingFound #SuicideLossSurvivor #BeTheWave #BeingTheWave #IAmTheWave #MilitarySuicide #SuicideLossDiary #SuicideLossJourney #SuicideLossDocumentary #SuicideLoss #SuicideLossPTSD #SuicideLossGrief #SuicideLossTrauma #SuicideLossSurvivorsStories #SurvivingSuicideLoss #SuicideLossSurvivorPTSD #SuicideLossPodcast #Healing #TraumaHealing #Greif #Grieving #TraumaGrieving #TraumaLoss #SelfLove #VeteransDay #InLovingHonor #ArmyVeteran #22aDay #PanicAttacks #Collateral Beauty #SuicideBereavement #SurvivorOfSuicideLoss #GrievingSuicide #SurvivorStory #SelfLove #MentalHealth #BodyLanguage #DancingInTheSky #SecondaryLoss