Dan Miller is back, and this time we are talking about the side of purity culture that almost never gets center stage: how it messes with men. While purity culture is usually framed around controlling women’s bodies and desires, Dan helps us unpack how men and those socialized as male are shaped by shame, fear, and some wildly unhealthy expectations. From being taught they are inherently dangerous to being trapped in rigid ideas of masculinity, this conversation looks at how purity culture limits emotional range, intimacy, and even basic self understanding long after people have deconstructed the theology.

We get into everything from the predator versus protector binary to the loneliness epidemic among men, why anger becomes the only socially acceptable emotion, and how the “slippery slope” logic around touch wrecks healthy connection. Dan also walks through what healing can actually look like, including somatic awareness, parts work, and relearning how to experience pleasure and desire without shame. We wrap by talking about what it might look like to raise boys differently, with more room for emotions, curiosity, and care. Equal parts thoughtful, validating, and gently unhinged in the best way, this episode is for anyone trying to unlearn the damage purity culture did to their body, their relationships, or their sense of self.

Connect with Dan:

Website: CTRR Practitioner bio page

Social Media: Straight White American Jesus Podcast, Co-Host, Instagram: @straightwhitejc, Twitter: @straightwhitejc

Email: danielmillerswaj@gmail.com

Resources discussed in this episode:

Jesus and John Wayne by Kristen Kobes duMez

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

To begin working with Andrew as a coach, schedule your FREE inquiry call here

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

To work with Laura as a coach, therapist, consultant, or to inquire about other services, you can do so here

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

Lauren Elise Rogers, certified holistic sexuality educator and embodied intimacy coach, shares her powerful journey from wedding night virgin in a high-control religious environment to becoming a leading voice in sexual health and relationship coaching. This conversation explores the lasting impacts of purity culture and practical pathways to reclaiming agency, pleasure, and authentic intimacy.

Share your purity culture stories with us by leaving a voicemail or sending your story to us!

Connect with Lauren:

Website: www.sexedforyou.com

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@sexedforyou

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/

Resources discussed in this episode:

Jeff Moran - 7 Steps to Sexual Healing

Necessary Endings by Henry Cloud

Fantasy Bond by Robert Firestone

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram @andrew_kerbs

Follow Andrew’s post-SDA account @lifeafteradventism

Follow Andrew’s account on neurodivergence and high control religion @divergent.faith

Join Andrew’s Substack (Kerb Your Enthusiasm) www.andrewkerbs.substack.com

To begin working with Andrew as a coach, schedule your FREE inquiry call here

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

Join Laura’s Substack (Therapy in the Headlines) www.drlauraeanderson.substack.com

To work with Laura as a coach, therapist, consultant, or to inquire about other services, you can do so here

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

The Sunday School Dropouts are back with another episode of answering your questions about religious trauma and the holidays. Many of the questions today centered around finding new traditions post-religion, dealing with family members who don’t understand why you won’t go to church, and how to navigate co-parenting around this time of year when one person has left the church and the other hasn’t. Plus, Andrew and Laura are at it again with another holiday quiz game and sharing some of their own stories of how they celebrated the holidays as they deconstructed.

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

Editing and Production by Kevin Crowe and can be found at kevincrowe.co.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year…or is it? The Sunday School Dropouts are taking on your questions today about all things having to do with religious trauma and the holidays! How do you set boundaries with your family that is still in church? Can you tell your emotionally immature family members that they are emotionally immature? Is it ok to tell your kids that you don’t trust churches and religious doctrine anymore? All these questions (and more!) will be answered today. And, you’ll also get to see who wins at holiday jeopardy between Andrew and Laura! Do YOU know what laughing-red-monster toy was the “it” toy of 1996? Tune in to find out!

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

Editing and Production by Kevin Crowe and can be found at www.kevincrowe.co

Laura and Andrew sit down with therapist and healing guide Elizabeth DeVaughn for a powerful conversation about what it really takes to move through trauma and come home to yourself. Elizabeth shares pieces of her own story, including the experiences that led her into this work, and opens up about the practices and principles that help people rebuild self trust after years of shame, fear, or being told to disconnect from their own bodies.

They talk about how self awareness and self compassion become the foundation of healing, why so many of our patterns are rooted in old survival strategies, and how to gently challenge the beliefs that no longer serve us. Elizabeth offers practical tools for strengthening self worth, interrupting harmful scripts from the past, and creating more space for authenticity in relationships. The three also explore the importance of community, nervous system support, and daily practices that keep us grounded as we unravel religious conditioning or trauma. It is an encouraging, honest conversation about becoming who you were always meant to be.

Share your purity culture stories with us by leaving a voicemail or sending your story to us!

Elizabeth's Info:

Website: CTRR Practitioner bio page

Social Media: Website: www.elizabethdevaughn.com, Instagram: @elizabethmdevaughn

Anything else (e.g. book title and link)

Resources discussed in this episode:

Rest is Resistance

Anatomy of Trust video by Brene Brown

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

To begin working with Andrew as a coach, schedule your FREE inquiry call here

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

To work with Laura as a coach, therapist, consultant, or to inquire about other services, you can do so here

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

Laura turns the tables and interviews her cohost, Andrew Kerbs, for an honest and often tender look at what it was like to grow up male in purity culture. Andrew shares stories from his childhood in both the Mormon church and the Seventh day Adventist tradition, unpacking how ideas about worthiness shaped everything from his family dynamics to his sense of self. Together they explore the quiet pressures boys and men face in high control religions, including secrecy around sexuality, the fear of being found out, and the shame that comes from never feeling good enough.

The conversation also dives into the messages men receive about pornography, addiction, and desire and how those narratives spill into relationships, mental health, and masculinity. Laura and Andrew talk about consent, body safety, and how to raise kids with honesty instead of fear. They also get into the healing side of things, from somatic practices and therapy to redefining masculinity and learning emotional intelligence outside the confines of religious purity. It is a vulnerable, thoughtful episode that gives space to experiences men rarely get to talk about and shows what reclaiming self worth can look like after leaving high control religion.

Share your purity culture stories with us by leaving a voicemail or sending your story to us!

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

To begin working with Andrew as a coach, schedule your FREE inquiry call here

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

To work with Laura as a coach, therapist, consultant, or to inquire about other services, you can do so here

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

Andrew and Laura sit down with Sherah Pettus from the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery for a real, heartfelt look at how purity culture keeps shaping our bodies, sexuality, and sense of worth long after we leave high control religion. Sherah brings her own story and a liberation-focused perspective to the conversation as they unpack everything from shame and sexual identity to raising kids with autonomy and consent instead of fear.

The episode is full of listener questions, honest reflections, and practical tools for reconnecting with your body, rebuilding self trust, and healing from purity culture’s double binds. They talk about desire, demisexuality, masturbation as resistance, and what it looks like to move beyond shame toward a more grounded, embodied, and compassionate relationship with yourself. Short, warm, and packed with insight, this one hits deep.

Share your purity culture stories with us by leaving a voicemail or sending your story to us!

Exercise from Sherah:

The Famous Five

1. Drink water when you’re thirsty
2. Rest when you're tired
3. Eat when you’re hungry
4. Move every day
5. Go to the bathroom when you need to go!

This helps to tune ourselves back into our bodies but also helps to gain trust because it helps us to become empowered in tiny ways

Sherah's Info:

Website: CTRR Practitioner bio page

Social Media: Instagram: @sherah.janell, Podcast: Get Sherah’d

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

To begin working with Andrew as a coach, schedule your FREE inquiry call here

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

To work with Laura as a coach, therapist, consultant, or to inquire about other services, you can do so here

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji

Andrew and Laura hang out with yoga therapist and somatic practitioner Kim June Johnson for a really grounding and honest conversation about what it actually looks like to heal purity culture wounds through Eastern practices. Kim shares her story of leaving evangelicalism, discovering yoga and breathwork, and slowly learning to trust her body again after years of shame and control. They talk about how Western religion often teaches people that they are broken at the core, while Eastern traditions start from the idea that people are already whole and worthy.

Kim also walks through the chakra system as a simple developmental framework, where each chakra represents a basic birthright like the right to be here or the right to feel. The three dig into how interoception, breathwork, and mindful movement can help people reconnect with their bodies in ways that go beyond talk therapy. There are lots of laughs, plenty of real talk about shame and sexuality, and a hopeful reminder that healing is not a race. It is a lifelong process of coming back to yourself at whatever pace feels right.

Share your purity culture stories with us by leaving a voicemail or sending your story to us!

Guest Info:

Website: CTRR Practitioner Bio Page

Social Media: IG: @healing.ground.embodiment

This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery

The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.

The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.

Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything

To begin working with Andrew as a coach, schedule your FREE inquiry call here

Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com

To work with Laura as a coach, therapist, consultant, or to inquire about other services, you can do so here

Hosts:

Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs

Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji