Today we are tackling something that we all have to deal with, but very few of us actually know how to do well: feedback.

In this episode, I am honored to be joined by leadership coach, speaker, and author Dr. J.R. Briggs. We are diving deep into the art of giving and receiving feedback, figuring out which of the two is actually more important (spoiler alert: it’s receiving!), and uncovering why feedback often feels so personal and scary.

J.R. shares an incredible story about trapeze school that perfectly illustrates why we need outside perspectives, and we talk about the practical things you can start doing today to completely change how you handle criticism and praise. We discuss how creating healthy feedback loops is the ultimate key to emotional intelligence and growth.

I walked away from this conversation with three specific things I am immediately applying to my day-to-day life, and I know you will too.

Take the free PIES assessment to see your inputs, outputs, and where your biggest area for growth is: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com/pies-assessment

In this episode, we cover:

Why receiving feedback is a more vital skill than giving it

The trapeze analogy: why we desperately need outside perspectives

Practical steps for receiving tough feedback without getting defensive (and the only two words you really need to say)

Why you must ask for permission before giving someone else feedback

How to calm your "reptilian brain" when you feel angry or triggered

The danger of overdrawing your "trust bank account" in relationships

Two powerful, vulnerable questions you can ask your trusted circle right now to uncover your blind spots

This is The Way You Show Up — a podcast and YouTube series all about the science of attraction and influence, and how focusing on these four pillars changes the way you show up at work, at home, in your marriage, in your parenting, and beyond.

New episodes every week. Subscribe so you don't miss one!

📖 J.R.'s Latest Book: https://bit.ly/4l2cJjI

Dr. J.R. Briggs lives with a clear and focused calling: to grow fruit on other people’s trees.

His work seeks to bridge the gap between spiritual formation and actionable leadership practices, aiming to help faith leaders and their organizations grow both in their faith and their impact on their communities.

I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.

The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."

We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health.

If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here.

New episodes every Tuesday.

Don't just exist. Show up.

🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com

🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes

👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

I'm back, y'all and SO much has happened since the last time we talked. In this episode, I'm sharing the updated science of attraction and influence and breaking down the PIES method: the four pillars that change the way you show up in every area of your life.

PIES stands for Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual, and each pillar has four specific inputs that you can control. These aren't about looking a certain way or performing for other people. They're about building the kind of embodied confidence that people notice when you walk into a room.
In this episode, I'm diving into all 16 inputs across the four pillars, busting some myths from the self-help world that keep people stuck, and sharing the personal experiences (including finishing my PhD!) that sparked a renewed vision for this work.

Oh, and I'm officially Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes now. 🎓

🔗 Take the free PIES assessment to see your inputs, outputs, and where your biggest area for growth is: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com/pies-assessment

In this episode, I cover:
The PIES method explained
The 4 inputs for Physical attraction & influence
The 4 inputs for Intellectual attraction & influence
The 4 inputs for Emotional attraction & influence
The 4 inputs for Spiritual attraction & influence
How to see where you're at risk for burnout
The free PIES assessment

This is the first episode of The Way You Show Up — a podcast and YouTube series all about the science of attraction and influence, and how focusing on these four pillars changes the way you show up at work, at home, in your marriage, in your parenting, and beyond.
New episodes every week. Subscribe so you don't miss one!

I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.

The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."

We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health.

If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here.

New episodes every Tuesday.

Don't just exist. Show up.

🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com

🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes

👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

A year ago, I stopped.

I stopped doing one of the things I loved the most.

I stopped because I was overwhelmed.
I stopped because I was chronically burnt out.
I stopped because I started doubting my purpose.

It felt like a wise and mature decision at the time.
Maybe it was

But what I slowly began to realize was that I stopped doing the thing that, when it came to my work, was one of the most life-giving.

Now, it's back.

But better.

For ten years, I’ve loved talking about the PIES because it changed my life.
I was depressed. Stuck. Anxious. Overworked.
My marriage was in shambles.
I had no friends.
I felt lost.

The PIES method allowed me to focus on becoming my best physically, intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually and focusing on what I could control.

Me.

And it changed my focus. It changed my energy. It changed me.

And over the past year, as I've finished my PhD (freaking finally!) I've realized that the PIES is even more powerful than I originally thought.

We're going to be talking about confidence, clarity, influence, and how what you do impacts the way you show up to those around you...

...and we're going to be doing it together with a new podcast, new title, and new content.

Same PIES.
Revamped.
Reimagined.
Redefined.

Can't wait to go along this journey with you.

Stay strong,
Dr. Kimberly

I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.

The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."

We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health.

If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here.

New episodes every Tuesday.

Don't just exist. Show up.

🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com

🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes

👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes