After a breakup, it's common to hear advice telling you to "reconnect with yourself" and "build your self-worth." But knowing what to do and knowing how to do it — or whether it's actually helping — are very different things.

In this episode, I explore why so many people feel stuck after a breakup, even when they're doing everything they're told should help. We look at what happens when self-worth has historically come from external validation, why breakups can feel like a loss of identity, and how the nervous system seeks reassurance when emotional safety is suddenly removed.

I talk about why healing doesn't always feel better straight away, how to recognise whether your efforts are genuinely supporting you, and how to tell the difference between discomfort that's part of growth and patterns that may be keeping you stuck. This episode also explores how self-worth is rebuilt through self-trust, emotional self-containment, and learning to stay with yourself during difficult emotions — rather than outsourcing them.

This conversation is for anyone who feels lost after a breakup, questions whether they're healing "correctly," or wants a deeper understanding of what rebuilding self-worth actually looks like in real life.

Book a free consultation: https://sylviasuwan.com/consultation

Work with Sylvia and Book a 10x session package: https://sylviasuwan.com

Starting over can feel like failure — especially after a breakup, divorce, or major life change. We tell ourselves we've wasted time, that we're behind, or that we should have tried harder to make it work.

In this episode, I'm reframing the idea of starting over and exploring why it feels so heavy — and how it can actually become one of the most liberating and clarifying seasons of your life.

We talk about the sunk cost fallacy, why staying just because you've already invested so much keeps people stuck, and how the meaning you attach to "starting again" shapes your future far more than the circumstance itself.

This episode is for anyone who feels ashamed about having to begin again, feels rushed by comparison, or is struggling to let go of a past they thought would last forever.

• Why starting over feels like failure — and why it isn't

• How the sunk cost fallacy keeps people stuck in relationships that no longer serve them

• The difference between learning from the past and ruminating on it

• How lessons can turn into wisdom — or emotional weight

• Why the belief that you're "behind" creates panic and poor decisions

• Letting go of timelines, comparison, and external pressure

• How starting over can actually be a sign of self-trust and alignment

• Practical ways to approach a new chapter without rushing or settling

Starting over doesn't mean you failed.
It means you're listening.
It means you're integrating what you've learned instead of repeating it.
And it means you're choosing to move forward with more awareness, clarity, and self-respect than before.

If you're in a season of rebuilding — after a breakup, divorce, or identity shift — this episode will help you reframe where you are and reconnect with the power of the present moment.

Book a free consultation: https://sylviasuwan.com/consultation

After a breakup, everyone tells you to "find yourself" — but what does that actually mean? And more importantly, is it even the right question to ask?

In this episode, I'm breaking down why the whole concept of "finding yourself" after a relationship ends might be setting you up for frustration, and what you should focus on instead.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why "finding yourself" is the wrong framework (and what to ask instead)
• The neuroscience of heartbreak — why breakups feel like physical pain and why separation is so difficult
• How relationships create neural coupling and nervous system co-regulation (and what happens when that suddenly stops)
• The difference between losing yourself and becoming enmeshed — and why women are particularly vulnerable to this pattern
• Why the standard advice (yoga, journaling, solo travel) often becomes performative rather than transformative
• Values archaeology: Whose values have you actually been living? How to trace back what's truly yours vs what you inherited
• Desire mapping: How to relearn what you actually want when you've spent years accommodating others
• Boundary experimentation: Small steps to reclaim your space without isolating yourself
• Integration work: What becomes possible now that wasn't before? How to take everything you've learned and consciously choose what to keep
• The Emily in Paris example: How exposure to new experiences reveals parts of yourself that were always there but never had room to exist

Book a free consultation with Sylvia: https://sylviasuwan.com/consultation

If you are ready to work with Sylvia book a 10 session package: https://www.sylviasuwan.com/work-with-me

Starting the new year without your ex? Feeling that mix of hope and loneliness as you try to move forward? In this episode, I'm giving you the exact framework I wish I had during my first New Year after a breakup.

This isn't about setting vague intentions that fizzle out by February. This is about creating real, sustainable change in your life using a proven 9-step goal attainment framework designed specifically for breakup recovery.

In This Episode, You'll Learn:

The 9 Steps to Transform Your Life After a Breakup:

1. Get Crystal Clear on What You Actually Want - Move beyond "I want to be happy" and define what your life actually looks like when you've moved forward
2. Identify Your Deep Why - Discover the real reason this goal matters to you (not just surface-level motivation)
3. Make a Concrete Plan - Break down your goal into specific, actionable behaviors you can schedule and commit to
4. Celebrate Small Wins and Build Belief - Learn why daily wins are more powerful than waiting for big transformations
5. Track and Monitor Your Progress - Use the "engine momentum" approach to keep yourself moving forward
6. Manage Your Emotions - Regulate your feelings so they don't derail your progress (emotions are signals, not signs to quit)
7. Stay Flexible and Keep Learning - Adapt your plan as you discover more about what you want and need
8. Surround Yourself with Mentorship - Choose your environment wisely and consume content from people who have the results you want
9. Align Your Environment - Set up your space and routines to support your goals, not sabotage them

Key Takeaway: You don't need to have it all figured out. You just need to take the next step, and then the next one. That's how you build momentum. That's how you transform this heartbreak into your breakthrough.

Resources Mentioned:

• Atomic Habits by James Clear

Action Step: Pick ONE goal this week. Get specific, write down your why, identify three actionable steps, schedule them in your calendar, and track your small wins daily.

Connect with Sylvia: Instagram: @sylviasuwan

Book a free consultation: https://sylviasuwan.com/consultation

In this deeply personal episode, I'm sharing the most important lessons and reflections from my own growth journey this year. This isn't me speaking from my therapist lens—it's me as a human navigating the messy, uncomfortable, necessary work of growth.

Learning to Be Okay with the Hard Why resistance makes everything worse, and how accepting discomfort changes everything

Growth Requires Increasing Your Capacity Why you can't have different results without becoming a different version of yourself

Taking Responsibility for Your Own Happiness How I stopped making my husband responsible for my emotional wellbeing (and why that actually improved our marriage)

What Destroys Relationships—With or Without Kids The surprising truth about what makes or breaks relationships, regardless of your circumstances

When You're in Growth Periods, Life is Mostly Miserable Why discomfort isn't a sign you're doing it wrong—it's a sign you're doing it right

Essentialism and Prioritising Your Values How to stop saying yes to everything and start protecting what actually matters

Don't Forget the Basics Why sleep, nutrition, and movement matter more than any productivity hack

Why Simple is Best How we overcomplicate everything to avoid doing the simple (but hard) work

Life is Too Short to Care What Other People Think Getting clear on your values and living by your own compass, not someone else's script

It's Not Happiness We Should Chase—It's Peace and Contentment Why chasing happiness keeps you miserable, and what to cultivate instead

🎯 Ready to make 2026 YOUR breakthrough year?

Join my FREE Masterclass: "Let Go of Your Ex and Move On" Register now to watch live or get the replay

Can't make it live? No worries—register anyway and I'll send you the replay

📲 Connect with me: Instagram: @sylviasuwan (DM me for the masterclass link!)

Quick bonus episode with an important announcement! I have a free live masterclass happening next week that I created specifically to help you kickstart your new year and finally move on from your ex.

Live Masterclass Details:

When: Monday, December 29th at 6pm AEST
Where: Register at sylviasuwan.com or check the link in show notes
Cost: FREE
Replay: Available for all registrants (perfect if you can't make it live due to time zones)

What This Masterclass Will Cover:

• Why you feel like your feelings are outside of your control and how that keeps you paralyzed
• Why it's not your fault (and nothing to be ashamed of) that you still want to be with your ex
• The real reason most people resist moving forward and what they make "letting go" mean
• Why some people seem to "handle" breakups better and move on faster (spoiler: nothing is wrong with you)
• What actually works to get you out of hopelessness and failure—and what doesn't
• The tangible things you need to do right now to get on with your life

Who This Is For:

This masterclass is for you if you've tried everything you're told you should do but still want to be with your ex or don't know how to be without them. It's for the person who is truly suffering and struggling to understand why.

Why This Is Different:

I've seen what works and what doesn't work in breakup recovery. This masterclass addresses exactly why healing works for some people and not others—and I'm sharing strategies you won't have heard before.

Register Now

Visit sylviasuwan.com or click the link above. Even if you can't make it live, register to get access to the replay.

The holidays can be brutal when you're still healing from a breakup. Everyone else seems to be celebrating with their loved ones while you're on the outside looking in. This episode isn't about making you feel better with platitudes—it's about empowering you to take control of your story.

In this episode, I'm getting real about why sitting in hopelessness keeps you stuck, and what you can do right now to start building the life you actually want. Because the truth is, no one is coming to save you. But the good news? You have everything you need to save yourself.

What You'll Learn:

• Why this difficult moment is temporary (even when it doesn't feel like it)
• How to shift from "there's nothing left for me" to "what can I create?"
• The question that will help you make this hard time count for something
• Why progress—not distraction—is what actually brings you up
• What makes someone attractive to be around (and whether you'd want to spend time with yourself right now)
• The biggest mistake people make about relationships that keeps them isolated
• How to stop waiting for someone else to make you feel better

The Hard Truth:

Relationships aren't about finding someone to fill the void. They're about what you contribute. If you're sitting around feeling sorry for yourself, you're not going to attract a great partner—you're going to attract someone just like you. And that's not who you want to be around.

Your Next Step:

Pick one thing you're going to do today to move yourself forward. Start building the life you want instead of waiting for someone else to create it for you. The life you want is on the other side of the action you take today.

Work With Me:

Book a free consultation https://sylviasuwan.com/consultation