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EPISODE 57 -DESCRIPTION

Two commercial pilots had a checklist for a cabin pressure problem. They followed every step except one. The plane crashed and everyone on board died.

If you love someone with addiction, you've been making the same mistake.

In Episode 57, Jason Coombs teaches the emotional raincoat: the one shift that separates families who burn out from families who create the conditions for their loved one's recovery. You'll hear the Tuesday morning scenario most families know by heart, the loving response Jason calls "Vitamin NI," and the night his parents put on their own raincoats and changed everything.

You don't stop loving them. You just stop drowning next to them.

Jason's book Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover is available on Audible and Amazon. Learn more at brickhouserecovery.com.

SHOW NOTES

Jason teaches the emotional raincoat: how to love someone through addiction without losing yourself in the storm. A real aviation tragedy, a Tuesday morning scenario every family knows, and the night Jason's parents stopped absorbing his consequences and finally created the conditions for his sobriety.

Timestamps

[01:53] The airplane tragedy that mirrors what families of addicted loved ones experience

[06:51] Introducing the emotional raincoat

[11:02] Why our natural caregiving instincts make addiction worse

[14:59] Tuesday morning scenario: without the raincoat vs. with it

[17:53] "Vitamin NI": the loving, boundaried response

[21:04] How the raincoat changes the weather in your home

[24:55] Why your loved one won't want recovery if sobriety looks miserable

[36:14] How Jason's parents created the conditions for his sobriety on March 19, 2009

[42:47] The prayer that cracked open Jason's path to lasting recovery

Key Quotes

"You cannot control the weather. You can't fix a storm."

"You don't stop loving them. You just stop drowning next to them."

"The storm was exactly the same. The phone call was the same. The difference was you."

Resources

Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover on Audible and Amazon.

Brick House Recovery: brickhouserecovery.com

Support the show

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

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If you’re the mom, dad, or spouse who has become the detective, the cleanup crew, and the emotional first responder, this one is for you.
In this solo episode, Jason Coombs sits down with the families who are exhausted from organizing their entire lives around someone else’s addiction. He shares the one shift that changes everything: your loved one’s recovery begins when you change first.
Jason is not speaking from theory. He is speaking from both sides of this. He was the addicted son. Four felonies. Homeless. Five treatment programs. Heroin, meth, and crack. And now, fifteen years sober, he has spent his career walking with families through the same fog he once put his own family through.
This episode is the permission slip you didn’t know you were waiting for.
What you’ll hear:
(01:08) The mothers who have become detectives, cleanup crews, and emotional first responders
(06:54) Laura’s story: five years, a daughter’s addiction, and the gap between knowing and doing
(11:47) Jason’s own story: felonies, homelessness, heroin, and five treatment programs
(17:32) The insider confession: how addiction studies the room and uses the family’s responses
(19:11) The sentence that changed everything: “Jana, Doug, get off the beach”
(22:57) Placing his son Nathan for adoption and the promise that became Jason’s turning point
(29:34) Why “wait for rock bottom” is some of the most dangerous advice in recovery
(41:31) The five-stage framework for living unhooked
The Insider Confession
Before Jason was the one teaching this, he was the reason his family needed it. And he is honest about what was happening on his end. Addiction studies the room. It learns who responds to fear, who caves to tears, who needs hope. Every rescue delayed his consequences. Every softened landing delayed his pain.
“Every time somebody helped me avoid the full weight of what I had created, it kept me insulated from the very thing that might have made me ready.”
Get Off the Beach
A therapist in Jason’s first treatment program told his parents: Jason is out in the middle of the lake dropping boulders. By the time those ripples reach the shore, they are tsunami-sized waves crashing over your heads. Get off the beach.
His parents changed the locks. They drew clear lines. And they did not wait for Jason to get sober before they started healing. They started healing while he was still sick. He noticed.
“Their commitment to reclaiming their life and their peace sent the message I needed to hear. I needed to see it in their actions.”
The Goldfish Bowl
You don’t fix the fish by yelling at it or pulling it out for a lecture and dropping it back into dirty water. You clean the bowl. The tone in the home, the boundaries, the access, the secrecy, the panic level: that’s the water. Change the water and you change the conditions that keep the disease alive.
Takeaways for families:
Stop waiting for rock bottom. You are the one who can move the

Support the show

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

Send us Fan Mail

Everyone is talking about ibogaine like it’s the cure for addiction.

I’m telling you why I’m saying no.

You’ve probably heard the buzz.

• A “breakthrough.”
• A “reset.”
• Maybe even the answer your family has been praying for.

Ibogaine is everywhere right now. Podcasts. Headlines. Conversations between people who are desperate for something to finally work.

So let’s talk about it.

In this episode, I give you my honest, unfiltered answer to the question I’ve been asked more than anything lately:

Is ibogaine the solution?

And my answer might not be what you expect.

• Not because I’m closed off.
• Not because I’m against new approaches.
• But because I’ve seen what happens when hope moves faster than truth and families pay the price.

Inside this episode, I break down:

• What’s actually true about ibogaine right now, not the hype
• The real risks most people are not talking about
• Why this is especially dangerous for the exact population it’s being marketed to
• A personal story that changed how I evaluate treatments forever

If you’re a parent, spouse, or loved one trying to make the right decision in the middle of chaos, this matters.

Because when you’re desperate, everything can start to sound like the answer.

This episode will help you slow down, think clearly, and make a decision you won’t regret.

Hit play before you make your next move.

Support the show

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

Send us Fan Mail

Seventeen years ago, I was a difficult, entitled client who had already failed four treatment centers. HR Brown owned the place where I finally got sober. He pulled me into his office one day, told me part of his story, and handed me his 12-year sobriety coin. He asked me to make a deal: in 12 years, I’d give that coin to a newcomer, and he’d hand me his 24-year coin. That moment planted hope in me when I had none.
This episode is that conversation. HR shares the night he had a gun in his mouth, the Easter morning he didn’t know was Easter when he finally surrendered, and the spiritual nudges that have shaped his life and ministry. We talk about why the physical side of addiction is only 10% of the problem, what families need to hear when their loved one says “I mean it this time,” and why recovery happens in relationships, not institutions.
If you’ve ever felt like God couldn’t possibly love you back, or you’re loving someone who keeps breaking promises, this one is for you.
Show Notes
Guest: HR Brown, founder of Renaissance Ranch and the man who helped me get sober
In this episode:
•(01:00) How HR and I first crossed paths in treatment
•(03:47) “I believed in God. I just didn’t think He believed in me.”
•(05:39) The night HR had a gun in his mouth and the angels he believes saved him
•(07:12) “Help me, help me, help me.” HR’s Easter morning surrender
•(10:58) The people who carried hope: Steve and Monk, the 300-pound biker
•(12:58) Why your loved one isn’t lying when they break the promise
•(16:12) Living life in 15-minute increments during active addiction
•(18:16) Why physical addiction is only 10% of the problem
•(19:19) The vision behind Renaissance Ranch
•(23:24) My spiritual anorexia and how the Ranch fed me
•(28:44) The 12-year coin moment that gave me hope when I had none
•(29:56) HR reveals he felt a nudge to give me that coin
•(31:36) Acting on spiritual promptings without rehearsing them first
•(34:15) The deal: “In 12 years, we meet back up”
•(38:34) The Easter basket and the note that called me a leader
•(42:54) HR’s wife at the golf tournament
•(48:26) “She was mine before she was yours.”
Worth marking:
•Hope is contagious. You catch it from people who already have it.
•Judge early recovery by what people do, not what they say.
•When your loved one says “I want help,” have a bed lined up. If they’re serious, they’ll go.
•You don’t get them sober and you don’t get them drunk. Stop carrying what isn’t yours.
•Spiritual nudges work when you act on them before you talk yourself out of them.
HR is in my book. I wrote about him in Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover.
Resources:
•HR’s nonprofit, The SOLida Foundation, mentorship and scholarships for people leaving treatment: thesolidafoundation.org
•Unhooked on Amazon and Audible
•brickhouserecovery.com
•liveunhooked.com
Share this with one person who needs to hear it. That’s how the nudge keeps going.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

Send us Fan Mail

You’ve tried everything. Nothing’s working. And somewhere in the back of your mind, you’re wondering if you’re making it worse. This episode is for you. Jason Coombs breaks down the Desperation to Decision Ladder: a five-rung framework that maps exactly where your loved one is in their journey toward change, and what your role actually looks like at each rung. Practical, honest, and built from lived experience.

Show Notes:
In this episode of the Brick House Recovery Podcast, Jason Coombs, person in long-term recovery and founder of Brick House Recovery, breaks down one of the most practical frameworks he’s developed for families who love someone struggling with addiction. If you’ve tried everything and feel like nothing’s working, this one’s for you.
Episode Highlights
[01:00] Three questions that stop families in their tracks
[02:30] Why being in long-term recovery doesn’t automatically make you an expert at helping others
[04:17] The pattern Jason sees over and over with families, and why love alone isn’t enough
[05:08] Why the sickest person in the room ends up setting the rules for everyone else
[06:37] Introducing the Desperation to Decision Ladder: a five-rung framework for understanding change
[07:10] Rung 1: The Pain Gets Loud, and why softening it is the worst thing you can do
[11:22] Rung 2: The Denial Weakens: you can’t break it with a speech, but you can stop competing with reality
[13:32] Rung 3: Truth Breaks Through: the gift of desperation and why addiction is the only disease that lies about itself
[15:57] Rung 4: Willingness Appears: why this is a window, not a door, and how to show up when it opens
[20:21] Rung 5: Commitment Is Chosen: why it has to be theirs, and what happens when you want it more than they do
[23:02] The two journeys happening at once: external signals vs. the inner work that actually matters
[25:01] Two real outcomes, divorce and staying together, and why both can be a win
[27:19] Applying the five rungs to yourself, because you have your own ladder to climb
[32:39] Naming the disease: why Jason called his addiction “Sancho” and how that changes everything
[35:32] Dancing instead of wrestling: how to have hard conversations without locking horns
[39:49] The Goldilocks Zone: love and law, justice and mercy, enabling and abandonment

Support the show

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

Send us Fan Mail

What happens when a woman’s heart finally gets the space to heal? Jason sits down with Melanie Meszaros, co-founder of Heart of a Woman retreats, to talk about the three core desires every woman carries, what fathers can do to protect their daughters, and why restored hearts don’t just change women — they change entire families.

Show Notes
There’s a metaphor I keep coming back to after this conversation: a river that’s been dammed up. The water doesn’t disappear — it just stops flowing. And the world downstream goes dry.
That’s what Melanie Meszaros helped me see about the feminine heart.
Melanie is the co-founder of Heart of a Woman retreats, a certified professional coach, and someone who stumbled into her calling the way most of us do — through a door she didn’t plan to open. She was “voluntold” into this work, and the world is better for it.
In this episode we go deep on:
•The three core desires that shape a woman’s heart — and why wounding hits hardest where longing runs deepest
•What fathers can do right now to speak worth into their daughters (this one hit close to home for me as a dad)
•A word for the mothers who’ve quietly decided their child’s addiction is their fault
•Simple daily rhythms that create space for real heart restoration
•Why three days at an intensive retreat can accomplish what years of small doses can’t
Melanie also shares what happened at her own family’s Sunday dinner after she did her own heart work — and it’s one of the most beautiful moments we’ve had on this show.
Resources mentioned:
•The Inheritance by Graham Cooke — a 10-minute audio Melanie recommends listening to daily for 30 days
•Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge — the foundation for the three core desires
•Heart of a Woman Retreat — October 8–10, 2026 (first 10 registrants get $100 off — promo code is 2026Brick100 )
•Boise Alumni Fireside Chat — April 25th at 1:00 PM

The Inheritance Video mentioned:

https://youtu.be/FgzXXKjaPZA?si=Ktr5AISPQzmPUg0m

•Scholarships available at theheartofawoman.net
Connect with Melanie:
📧 support@theheartofawoman.net
🌐 theheartofawoman.net
Connect with Jason:
📖 Unhooked — available on Amazon and Audible
🌐 brickhouserecovery.com

Support the show

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

Send us Fan Mail

What if the most loving thing a family can do is stop helping? In this raw solo episode, Jason Coombs shares the unfiltered story of his addiction, his parents’ breaking point, and the family therapy moment that changed everything: “Get off the beach.” If you’re exhausted from absorbing the waves of someone else’s addiction, this episode was made for you.

There’s a moment in almost every family’s addiction story where love and enabling look identical. You can’t tell them apart. That’s not weakness — that’s the nature of the disease.
In this solo episode, Jason pulls back the curtain on the season of his addiction that nearly destroyed his family, and the unexpected turning point that started their healing — long before his own sobriety began.
This one is personal. And it might be exactly what you need to hear today.

🌊 The tsunami metaphor — why every decision an addict makes eventually crashes onto the family shore
🔥 The night Jason confessed to his parents, and how their loving response quietly reinforced his denial
🪑 The family therapy session that gave his parents three words that changed everything: “Get off the beach”
🔐 The Cracker Barrel boundary — changed locks, restricted access, and the manipulation that finally didn’t work
👶 Nathan’s birth and the painful gift of placing his son for adoption — the why that grew bigger than the addiction
🌭 The hot dog stand conversation 72 days into sobriety that launched the mission behind Unhooked
🎣 How family members get “hooked” — managing probation, covering for their loved one’s boss, softening every consequence
💡 Jason’s five-principle boundary framework — a practical roadmap for exhausted families.

“For the first time, my parents understood that to love me did not mean to rescue me. It meant setting boundaries. It meant getting healthy. It meant getting off the beach and taking their life back.”

TIMESTAMP GUIDE:
∙[00:59] The survivors of the Titanic — why shared pain creates unlikely community
∙[01:21] The tsunami wave analogy explained
∙[03:28] The confession on the fireplace bricks — and the response that reinforced the disease
∙[06:12] “Get off the beach” — the family therapy moment
∙[08:38] The Cracker Barrel boundary conversation
∙[10:23] When the manipulation stopped working
∙[10:48] Nathan’s birth and the adoption decision
∙[13:53] The hot dog stand and the birth of Unhooked
∙[20:16] How families get hooked without realizing it
∙[21:12] Why pain is the engine of change
∙[29:14] The five-principle boundary framework
∙[33:59] Writing down what you “hear that isn’t said”

RESOURCES MENTIONED:
📘 Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover — available on Amazon and Audible
💻 Live Unhooked Course + Community — brickhouserecovery.com
📞 Brick House Recovery — 208-286-4274

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100

Send us Fan Mail

There’s a moment most families never forget.
It’s not the first time they found the pills. It’s not the arrest, or the call from the hospital, or the Christmas that fell apart. It’s quieter than that. It’s the moment they realize that everything they did out of love, the bail, the hotel rooms, the money on the jail books, the middle-of-the-night rescues, may have been feeding the very thing trying to destroy their child.
That’s where this episode begins. And it doesn’t stay there.
In Episode 50 of the Get Unhooked Podcast, Jason Coombs delivers one of the most personal and practically powerful coaching sessions he’s ever recorded. This isn’t a lecture. It’s a living room conversation with someone who has been on both sides of the wreckage, the addict and the son, and who has spent years turning that wreckage into a roadmap for families who are still in the middle of it.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
∙Jason’s mother Janna share her testimony, from enabling in desperation to loving without losing herself
∙A rarely shared chapter of Jason’s personal story, including his childhood sensitivity, co-occurring diagnoses, and a newly discovered Auditory Processing Disorder that finally explained decades of struggle
∙How Jason became entangled in Utah’s largest OxyContin drug ring and watched the news story break on the very TV station where he worked
∙Jennifer Chase, Brick House team member and a mother walking her own road, asking one of the most honest questions of the episode: “How do they feel loved when I tell them I can’t get them a hotel room?”
∙A practical breakdown of the Stages of Change model and why expecting action-stage behavior from a pre-contemplation-stage person is a setup for heartbreak on both sides
∙Why relapse is not a moral failure. It’s a stage, and understanding that changes everything
∙Jason’s personal recovery beyond sobriety, including compulsive behaviors the recovery world doesn’t always talk about
∙Why faith over fear isn’t just spiritual advice. It’s the most effective influence strategy a family member can adopt
The truth this episode keeps returning to:
You cannot love someone into recovery. But you can learn to love them in a way that stops blocking it.
Janna Coombs didn’t find that truth through a program or a checklist. She found it the hard way, through years of trying to fix what she couldn’t fix, until she finally put down the weight of an outcome she was never meant to carry.
“If you don’t have hope one day,” she says, “just think of Jason’s story and take some of my hope. Miracles can happen.”
That’s the heart of this episode. Not a promise that it gets easy. A promise that it gets possible.
Resources mentioned:
∙Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover by Jason Coombs, available on Amazon and Audible
∙Fight the New Drug, fighthenewdrug.org
∙Brick House Recovery, brickhouserecovery.com
∙Stages of Change Model, Prochaska & DiClemente
Connect with Jason:
📧 jason@brickhouserecovery.com
📞 208-286-4274
🌐 brickhouserecovery.com

Support the show

Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.

For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/

For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com

https://awarriorheart.com/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100

To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/

$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100