Showing results by narrator "Jesse Bernstein" in All Categories

Look, I didn't want to be a half-blood. I never asked to be the son of a Greek God. I was just a normal kid, going to school, playing basketball, skateboarding. The usual. Until I accidentally vaporized my maths teacher. That's when things started really going wrong. Now I spend my time fighting with swords, battling monsters with my friends, and generally trying to stay alive. This is the one where Zeus, God of the Sky, thinks I've stolen his lightning bolt - and making Zeus angry is a very bad idea.

I look like a normal kid. Only there's a difference. Poseidon, God of the Sea is my dad. Which sounds cool, but actually means there is usually someone (or something), somewhere, trying to kill me. Now I live at Camp Half-Blood, with other kids like me. But Camp Half-Blood is a bit different to most summer camps. Instead of toasting marshmallows and singing campfire songs, we battle giant cannibals at dodgeball. This time, we're under attack and I need to get my hands on the Golden Fleece or we'll be invaded by monsters. Big ones.

The fifth fantastic adventure in the Percy Jackson series is now available to download, complete and unabridged, on audio! The greatest monster of all, the storm giant Typhon, is on the loose, wreaking havoc and destruction across the U.S. - while Kronos's army lays siege to Manhattan. Soon Percy Jackson must make the hardest choice of his life - a choice that will save or destroy the world.

The third fantasy adventure in the Percy Jackson series is now available to download, complete and unabridged, on audio. It's the last Friday before the winter holidays but Percy Jackson isn't at school: he's battling the fearsome Manticore (half human, half lion), which in itself isn't ideal . . . but with Annabeth missing and the goddess of the hunt held captive, things get a whole lot more serious . . . Greek mythology relocated to modern-day America.

The fourth incredible adventure in the Percy Jackson series. "Honestly, blowing up another school was the last thing I wanted to do. As the son of a Greek god, I've had my share of near-death disaster. This summer, I didn't choose to battle the cheerleading squad, but when two hissing she-devils with fangs are heading straight for you, what's a half-blood meant to do?"

Everyone's favorite game maker, Mr. Lemoncello, is testing out his new Fabulous Fact-Finding Frenzy game! If Kyle can make it through the first round, he and the other lucky finalists will go on a great race - by bicycle, bookmobile, and even Mr. Lemoncello's corporate banana jet - to find fascinating facts about famous Americans. The first to bring their facts back to the library will win spectacular prizes! But when a few surprising "facts" surface about Mr. Lemoncello, it might be go to jail and lose a turn all at once!

In response to an awful camp orientation video created by the god Apollo, Percy Jackson and other residents of Camp Half-Blood answer such questions as 'what is this place?' and 'do I get to keep the T-shirt?' Newbies can check out the section on the Divine Cabins, read up on Magical Landmarks, and consult the chapter of Training Arenas. But Camp Half-Blood Confidential explores much more than just the buildings and grounds. It includes info that can be learned only from those who live there.

In this gripping follow-up to Percy Jackson and the Greek Gods, demigod Percy Jackson tells the stories of twelve of the original Greek heroes in all their gory, bloodthirsty glory. Want to know who cut off Medusa's head? Which hero was raised by a she-bear? Who tamed Pegasus, the winged horse? Percy has all the answers....

Welcome, boys and girls, listeners of all ages, to the first-ever Library Olympiad! Kyle and his teammates are back, and the world-famous game maker, Luigi Lemoncello, is at it again! This time Mr. Lemoncello has invited teams from all across America to compete in the first ever Library Olympics. Will it be fun? Like the commercials say... hello? It's a Lemoncello! But something suspicious is going on.... Books are missing from Mr. Lemoncello's library. Is someone trying to censor what the kids are reading?

Penguin presents the unabridged, downloadable, audiobook edition of Percy Jackson and the Greek Gods by Rick Riordan, read by Jesse Bernstein. Who could tell the true stories of the gods and goddesses of Olympus better than modern-day demigod Percy Jackson? In this action-packed tour of Greek mythology, Percy gives his hilarious personal views on the feuds, fights and love affairs of the Olympians. Want to know how Zeus came to be top god? How many times Kronos ate one of his own kids?

After months of anticipation, Mr. Lemoncello is taking his games out of the library and going live across the nation on the world-famous Kidzapalooza Television Network! Everyone's invited to audition, but only a lucky few will be chosen to compete in front of millions of viewers in a brand-new, completely immersive live-action breakout game - with real kids as the playing pieces! Kyle Keeley is determined to be one of them. 

Jude and her brother, Noah, are incredibly close twins. At thirteen, isolated Noah draws constantly and is falling in love with the charismatic boy next door, while daredevil Jude surfs and cliff-dives and wears red-red lipstick and does the talking for both of them. But three years later, Jude and Noah are barely speaking. Something has happened to wreck the twins in different and divisive ways…until Jude meets a cocky, broken, beautiful boy, as well as an unpredictable new mentor.

A mysterious island. An abandoned orphanage. A strange collection of very curious photographs. As our story opens, a horrific family tragedy sets 16-year-old Jacob journeying to a remote island off the coast of Wales, where he discovers the ruins of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children. As Jacob explores its abandoned bedrooms and hallways, it becomes clear that the children were more than just peculiar. They may have been dangerous. And somehow—impossible though it seems—they may still be alive.

Kyle Keeley is the class clown, popular with most kids, (if not the teachers), and an ardent fan of all games: board games, word games, and particularly video games. His hero, Luigi Lemoncello, the most notorious and creative game maker in the world, just so happens to be the genius behind the building of the new town library. Lucky Kyle wins a coveted spot to be one of the first 12 kids in the library for an overnight of fun, food, and lots and lots of games. But when morning comes, the doors remain locked. Kyle and the other winners must solve every clue and every secret puzzle to find the hidden escape route.

When his classmates learn about Fido, the guinea pig that acts like a dog, they all want a piece of Rufus, her owner. But Rufus hates the attention, the demands, the "celebrity." So he decides to make Fido learn how to be an actual guinea pig. But when she goes missing, he feels terrible. Was she lost, "dognapped," or did she run away, because he no longer liked her just the way she was? Offering the same offbeat humor and pacing of the first Guinea Dog, this novel will prove to be a listener's best friend.

When Rufus, Murphy, Lurena, and their pets go camping, they meet Pedro, a shy boy who seems afraid of just about everything - especially the water. One thing leads to another and the kids go into a nearby town to buy him a pet to cheer him up - a guinea pig, naturally. Yet what they bring home may look like a guinea pig, but it can swim - like an otter.

All Dylan wants is mojo. What is mojo? It's power. The ability to command respect. It's everything Dylan doesn't have. He gets no respect at school, and when he finds the dead body of a classmate, even the police push him around. All the thanks he gets for trying to help the investigation with his crime-drama skills is a new nickname at school: Body Bag. So when Dylan hears about a missing rich girl from the other side of town, he jumps at the chance to dive into this mystery. Surely if he cracks a case involving a girl this beautiful and this rich, he'll get the mojo he's looking for.

The Tragedy Paper follows the story of Tim Macbeth, a seventeen-year-old albino and a recent transfer to the prestigious Irving School, where the motto is “Enter here to be and find a friend.” A friend is the last thing Tim expects or wants - he just hopes to get through his senior year unnoticed. Yet, despite his efforts to blend into the background, he finds himself falling for the quintessential “It” girl, Vanessa Sheller, girlfriend of Irving’s most popular boy. To Tim's surprise, Vanessa is into him, too, but she can kiss her social status goodbye if anyone ever finds out.

Leo and Remi have saved the wacky, wonderful Whippet Hotel, but their adventures aren't over. Anything is possible on the field of wacky inventions: some are scary (like a genetically altered twelve-foot chicken); some are dangerous (like a pond full of electric eels); some are completely out of control; and somehow, Leo and Remi will take it all in stride.

Ranging in age from six to 40, 38 sons and daughters of lesbians offer brief essays that could be valuable to like offspring, as well as to relatives and friends trying to understand the problems such children face. Homophobia, visited upon the children as well as their mothers, is the most commonly cited concern; some younger contributors feel isolated from their peers, and a couple of boys endure rejection from radical lesbian acquaintances.