The steep increase in mental health challenges among young children is one of today’s most widely discussed issues. But why is so little attention paid to the role of family dynamics in creating or reducing stress for kids?

This week, Ian and Naomi are joined by Dr. Nicholas Zill, research psychologist and senior fellow at the Institute for Family Studies, to discuss his most recent report, “Families Matter to Kids’ Mental Health.” In the report, Dr. Zill analyzes data from the National Survey on Children’s Health to demonstrate how family structure affects not only the likelihood children will need mental health services, but also whether they will receive them. He points out a number of striking findings, including how foster children are the group most likely to be using medication to treat mental health problems. Dr. Zill emphasizes how understanding a child’s family structure is vital to treating their mental health, and how other methods of combatting mental illness beyond medication should be employed as well.

Resources

-Families Matter to Kids’ Mental Health | Nicholas Zill

-Why Foster Kids Aren’t Getting the Mental Health Care They Need | Naomi Schaefer Riley

Show Notes

-00:44 | Why does family structure get missed in the conversation about kids’ mental health?

-08:25 | Why does the gap between the need and receipt of mental health services come from? How can we close that gap?

-11:48 | How do we share this data without seeming like we are blaming families for their impact on a child’s mental health?

-13:08 | How do we make sure we are talking about the youth mental health crisis in an accurate, right-sized way?

-16:46 | Do younger generations having different attitudes toward marriage and forming families?

-18:29 | What is the good news on this issue?

-21:23 | How can we encourage reporting of data on family structure?

Conventional wisdom suggests that developing a child’s intellect is the job of schools, but parents spend far more time with their kids than teachers do. There is a lot that parents can and should do on this front.

This week, Naomi is joined by Eva Moskowitz, founder and CEO of Success Academy Charter Schools in New York City, and author of the recent book, A+ Parenting: The Surprisingly Fun Guide to Raising Surprisingly Smart Kids. Eva discusses how many parents feel an obligation to come down to their child’s level when it comes to speech or play, but in fact, their child may benefit more from being included in the complex or stimulating discussions and activities that parents are already enjoying. From movies, to games, to music played in the car, Eva has curated a list of materials and activities that are both age-appropriate and intellectually challenging for kids. What is important, Eva argues, is for parents to enjoy time with their kids, as this creates greater satisfaction for children, too.

Resources

-A+ Parenting: The Surprisingly Fun Guide to Raising Surprisingly Smart Kids | Eva Moskowitz

-Teach Your Children Well | Naomi Schaefer Riley

Show Notes

-00:55 | What inspired you to write this book?

-03:27 | How should parents work to develop their child’s intellect differently than schools?

-06:16 | How does this guidance translate across class divides? Are you hoping to bridge the gap between parents who are familiar with these cultural staples and those who aren’t?

-09:57 | Why does the specific book a child reads matter beyond just the fact that they are reading at all?

-11:59 | Can you give an example of the type of movie that is worthwhile for kids to watch, and why?

-15:46 | How do you know when these activities are appropriate, or if too much is going over the child’s head?

-18:08 | What are your thoughts on the impact of cellphones and social media on children’s intellectual development?

-21:08 | How can we engage in parenting in a way that helps us find more of the joy in the process?

Why do some members of the “elite class”—those who are educated, wealthy, and largely raised in stable, two-parent homes—publicly advocate for harmful beliefs while not subscribing to them in their private lives?

This week marks Are You Kidding Me?’s 100th episode! For this special episode, Naomi and Ian are joined by Rob Henderson, psychologist and author of the recent book Troubled: A Memoir of Foster Care, Family, and Social Class. Having experienced an unstable childhood in the foster care system before then enlisting in the military and going on to complete a PhD in psychology, Rob observed a phenomenon among American elites he eventually coined as “luxury beliefs.” Luxury beliefs are held ideas that confer status to the wealthy while inflicting harm on the poor and working class. Rob discusses where he believes this phenomenon originated, the practical impact it has for low-income communities, and how he tries to reverse the trend through sharing data and encouraging people to think more deeply about the ideas they are espousing.

Resources

1. Troubled: A Memoir of Foster Care, Family, and Social Class | Rob Henderson
2. Luxury Beliefs That Only the Privileged Can Afford | Rob Henderson
3. Troubled: A Book Event with Rob Henderson | Naomi Schaefer Riley, Sally Satel, Rob Henderson

Show Notes

01:05 | Can you talk about your background with the foster care system, and what the biggest influence in your early years was on your thinking later in life?

02:59 | What was the pivot for you that allowed you to find success and eventually write your book?

09:56 | Why are members of the “elite class” so predisposed to express certain beliefs in public but not hold to them in their private lives?

15:04 | How does the act of holding luxury beliefs by the elite class impact members of the working class?

18:45 | Can you talk about the luxury belief dynamic as it plays out with drug use, and how is that dynamic playing out in families?

23:52 | Are you finding that some of the ideas you express in your book are being made by others into their own kinds of luxury beliefs?

26:57 | How do we confront luxury beliefs in such a way that we can reverse the impact they are having on low income communities?