Most couples think they know what's hurting their marriage.

Poor communication. Different sex drives. Parenting disagreements. Financial stress. Growing apart.

That's exactly what one couple thought, too.

After 18 years of marriage, they came to Dan convinced they knew what needed fixing. But as they peeled back the layers, they uncovered a deeper problem—one neither of them had recognized—and that discovery changed everything.

In this episode, Dan shares the surprising reframe that brought new hope to their marriage. Along the way, you'll discover why some conflicts keep repeating, how hidden struggles can quietly shape your relationship, and why God's grace is far more powerful than many of us realize.

If your marriage feels stuck or you're tired of having the same arguments over and over, this episode offers a hopeful perspective that just might change the way you see your relationship—and yourself.

And if you'd like further help, you can check out the resources on our website, including our Next Level Couples Coaching Program, Men's Only and Women's Only coaching programs, and our apps: Intimately Us, Just Between Us, and Spark'd.

Shame thrives in secrecy—but healing doesn't.

In this deeply honest conversation, Dan sits down with Craig Perra, a former attorney whose secret life of pornography, strip clubs, prostitution, and compulsive sexual behavior nearly destroyed everything he cared about.

After years of trying therapy, recovery groups, and identifying himself as a "sex addict," Craig reached a breaking point. What happened next completely changed how he viewed healing.

Together, Dan and Craig explore why destructive behaviors often serve as coping strategies, how shame can keep us trapped, and why true healing begins with self-leadership instead of self-hatred.

They discuss:

• Why all behavior is need-seeking behavior
• The hidden role shame plays in compulsive sexual behavior
• Why some experts are moving away from the "sex addiction" label
• How Parts Work helps people understand—not fight—themselves
• The difference between suppressing urges and building real integrity
• Practical hope for anyone feeling stuck in cycles of secrecy

Whether you're personally struggling, supporting a spouse, or simply trying to understand how lasting change happens, this episode offers a compassionate and thought-provoking perspective on healing.

And if you'd like futher help creating lasting change, check out how you can work with Dan and his team to reach your goals.

Resources:

Free offer from Craig: Text "Dan sent me" to 877-356-5573 for a free pdf of Craig's 175 page workbook on breaking bad habits and addictions.

You can also find Craig Perra at these other locations:

• Patterns of Power Podcast
• The Mindful Habit System
• Instagram
• YouTube
• Facebook

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

What does the Constitutional Convention have to do with your marriage?

More than you might think.

As we celebrate Independence Day, Dan explores one of the greatest acts of collaboration in history—the creation of the U.S. Constitution—and uncovers surprising lessons for couples navigating differences in intimacy, communication, and connection.

The delegates in Philadelphia didn't create unity by forcing everyone to agree. They built structures that honored competing needs. Your marriage can too.

In this episode you'll learn:

• Why trying to "win" intimate disagreements keeps couples stuck
• How to create conversations where both spouses feel represented
• The difference between compromise and true collaboration
• Practical ideas for building your own "marriage convention"
• Why a more perfect union—not a perfect marriage—is the goal

This Independence Day, celebrate more than freedom. Celebrate building a marriage where both of you can flourish.

What if the key to better orgasms, less pain during sex, and greater confidence in intimacy isn't in your head—it's in your pelvic floor?

In this episode, Dan sits down with pelvic floor physical therapist Kristin Damery to discuss the often-overlooked foundation of sexual wellness. Kristin explains how pelvic floor health affects arousal, orgasm, pain during intercourse, blood flow, muscle function, and overall sexual satisfaction.

You'll learn:

• Why painful sex is common—but not normal
• The difference between a weak pelvic floor and an overly tight one
• Why Kegels can sometimes make problems worse
• How pelvic floor health impacts orgasm intensity and reliability
• What causes pain during intercourse and what you can do about it
• The role of breathing, stretching, and relaxation in sexual pleasure
• How vibrators can be used as a helpful therapeutic tool
• Practical steps women can take to improve pelvic health and intimacy

Kristin also shares her favorite advice for couples who want to deepen intimacy and keep exploring together in marriage.

Whether you've experienced pain, difficulty reaching orgasm, changes after childbirth, or you're simply curious about optimizing your sexual health, this episode offers practical, hopeful guidance.

Resources mentioned:
• LavaLube (Use code GYMO20 for 20% off your first order): https://mylavalube.com/
• Get Your Marriage On Events & Coaching: https://getyourmarriageon.com/

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

What happens when you realize your spouse still loves you—but doesn't really like you?

After 20 years of marriage, that's the realization Matt Sallas faced.

In this episode, Matt shares how addiction, obligation-based sex, and emotional disconnection nearly destroyed his marriage—and the framework that helped rebuild trust, attraction, and intimacy.

We discuss emotional safety, emotional masculinity, the difference between reluctant and enthusiastic consent, and Matt's simple "Sex Sequence" for creating a marriage both spouses genuinely enjoy.

• The difference between love and like in marriage
• Why emotional safety matters more than most couples realize
• The hidden cost of obligation-based sex
• Matt's 3-step Sex Sequence framework
• How emotional masculinity strengthens intimacy
• The "Always Be Dating" mindset

Matt's relationship survey: untoxicatedsurvey.org

Matt's podcast: https://un-toxicated.com/

Get Your Marriage On events: https://getyourmarriageon.com/events

Spark'd app:

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Has your sex life become a little too predictable?

In this episode, Dan shares 7 simple principles to help couples break out of routine, deepen connection, and bring more fun, playfulness, and excitement into their intimate relationship. From creating an intimacy menu to exploring new experiences together, you'll learn practical ways to stop having boring sex and start creating more meaningful connection.

Resources from the episode:

• Awesome date night and intimacy apps
• Sexploration List
• International Lovemaking Day Bedroom Boxes
• Christian Couples Improving Sex & Intimacy Facebook Group
• Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program
• Intimacy Menu

Products we love:

• Evree Massage Cream and podcast episode
• LavaLube
• COCONU
• EveryLove Intimates

Most people think being a good spouse means being selfless, accommodating, and easygoing.

But what if those same habits are quietly creating resentment, frustration, and disconnection?

In this episode, we're joined by Stu Murray, a men's leadership coach, to discuss the "Nice Guy Pattern"—the tendency to suppress your own needs, avoid conflict, and hope your partner will magically figure out what you want.

Together we explore:

• What covert contracts are and why they create resentment
• Why people-pleasing often leads to less intimacy, not more
• How unspoken expectations damage emotional safety
• The connection between honesty, desire, and attraction
• Why many men struggle to express what they really want
• Practical steps to stop self-abandoning and start showing up authentically

If you've ever thought, "After everything I do, why don't I feel appreciated?" this episode is for you.

You'll learn how greater honesty, responsibility, and authenticity can create stronger connection—and often more intimacy—in your marriage.

Episode Resources

Come cruise with us this fall!

Don't miss out on the International Lovemaking Day Challenge going on now in the Intimately Us app!

Find Stu on Youtube (https://www.youtube.com/@iamstumurray) and Instagram: @iamstumurray

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

Differences in sexual desire can feel deeply personal. One spouse feels rejected. The other feels pressured. And both end up wondering if something is wrong with their marriage.

In this episode, Dan shares three principles that can completely change the way you think about desire differences in marriage. He talks honestly about the hidden power dynamics couples fall into, why conflict around sex is actually an opportunity for growth, and how sometimes "low desire" is actually a wise response to unhealthy meanings attached to sex.

You'll learn:

• Why every marriage has a higher and lower desire spouse
• The three unhealthy ways couples typically handle sexual conflict (and how to do it better)
• Why vulnerability is often more powerful than pressure
• How to stop using sex for validation and start creating truly good sex together

This episode is honest, hopeful, and deeply practical for couples who feel stuck in painful intimacy patterns.

If you've ever felt lonely, rejected, pressured, unseen, or exhausted by the pursuit-withdraw cycle in your marriage, this episode is for you.

And if you'd like personal help implementing these principles, our program can help you take those first steps, even if your spouse isn't on board. After all,