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  • The Courage to Be Disliked 

  • How to Free Yourself, Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness
  • Written by: Fumitake Koga, Ichiro Kishimi
  • Narrated by: Adrian Mulraney
  • Length: 6 hrs and 50 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (1,043 ratings)

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The Courage to Be Disliked  cover art

The Courage to Be Disliked 

Written by: Fumitake Koga,Ichiro Kishimi
Narrated by: Adrian Mulraney
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Publisher's Summary

The Japanese phenomenon that teaches us the simple yet profound lessons required to liberate our real selves and find lasting happiness. 

The Courage to Be Disliked shows you how to unlock the power within yourself to become your best and truest self, change your future and find lasting happiness. Using the theories of Alfred Adler, one of the three giants of 19th-century psychology alongside Freud and Jung, the authors explain how we are all free to determine our own future - free of the shackles of past experiences, doubts and the expectations of others. 

It's a philosophy that's profoundly liberating, allowing us to develop the courage to change and to ignore the limitations that we and those around us can place on ourselves. The result is an audiobook that is both highly accessible and profound in its importance. Millions have already benefited from its wisdom. Now that The Courage to Be Disliked has been published in English, so can you. 

Please note: This is a recording of the 2018 print edition. 

©2017 Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga (P)2018 Bolinda Publishing Pty Ltd

What listeners say about The Courage to Be Disliked 

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An excellent introduction to Adlerian Psychology

Through discourses between a skeptical student and a philosopher, the author provides a gentle introduction to Adlerian philosophy and psychology. This book discusses positive psychology and the ability to remove obstacles hindering one's pursuit of happiness. Contrary to Freudian psychology which emphasizes past experiences as shaping one's current psychological condition, Adlerian psychology focuses on the present reality and the ability to change. This could be a life changing book for many.

9 people found this helpful

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very badly narrated, I thought it's a bestseller

narrator has made it as boring as possible, don't go for the audio version, not at all worth of time

4 people found this helpful

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wow!!!

it was so engaging. never felt bored.the teacher student conversation format was the highlight of this book.and definitely it is bold and direct to the point .it challenges a lot of beliefs which we thought were philosophically correct.A relief knowing that real courage is to live life even though being disliked.

3 people found this helpful

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Review...

This is the first time I have listened to an audible book..it was a good experience...the narration was excellent...sometimes I have had to listen to the lines again and again to understand....as my mind wavered.....I realised I wasn't living at the now ...overall I definitely enjoyed the book..thanks

2 people found this helpful

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One hell of a book.

Summation of all your worries. Presented in beautiful dialogue delivery. Monotonous may be. But the questions that arises are those that you might be asking your self during the dialogue. Adlerian psychology may be a century old but still as relevant as it can be. Must for one who always want to find a meaning in their life. Thanks.

1 person found this helpful

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  • PR
  • 30-03-22

terrible audio levels.

please adjust volume or give user controls. can barely hear this on max volume.

1 person found this helpful

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Highly recommended

I initially found this book heavy going. In particular the format and narration put me off at the beginning. But the ideas presented seemed interesting and kept me going. As I progressed however I was hooked. I also realized that the dialogue format was in fact a perfect way of addressing the doubts and questions that a reader is likely to have as they grapple with the concepts the book presents.

The ideas presented in the book often seem counter to conventional wisdom and yet they make real sense. This is not an easy book to go through. It doesn’t present clichéd self-help tips in an easy to swallow capsule. What it did do for me however was to help me reexamine some of my beliefs and behavior, to see them in a new light, to recognize that what I am and what I do are not deterministic, and to realize that exercising the choice to shed unproductive emotional baggage might eventually lead to a simpler and more fulfilling existence.

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Excellent conversation to listen into and listen to.

The conversation between the philosopher and the young man as it takes one from divergent points of view towards a point of agreement is quite engaging. Remove any lens you may have about philosophy or psychology or even terms like happiness and courage and listen to it with an open mind and it will reveal upon you the simplicity we need to acknowledge around us.
I hope and pray that the reader will also be able to make more comrades in their lives.

The book itself serves as a good introduction to Adlerian psychology which resonated well with me for multiple reasons. The way in which the nuances of our living and thinking are opened to reveal the simplicity around us makes it worth the while.

I will gladly recommend this to anyone and see myself doing a re-run of the audiobook in the future too.

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Good one

A very good listen. Few sections might need to be listened multiple times to understand the concepts and messages.

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Beautiful bridge between psychology and philosophy

Absolutely a worthy read! The title pretty much maps it out, yet it's a lot more than that. It's THE guide for mustering the courage to be free of the strings that we unconsciously attach ourselves to! Great ideas and insights..

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  • Blair Elton
  • 28-08-19

Approachable, applicable.

Hints of Buddhism, Stoicism, antifragility and all the elements of practical psych & philosophy in an easy to listen to, conversational form. Loved it!

2 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 31-07-19

You Will have some many "aha" moments

Great Book, you will be complete inmerse in the dialogues! If you are looking for something new and fresh, this book is for you

2 people found this helpful

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  • Lolly Gwabavu
  • 28-06-19

Great concepts, poor execution

Some really great insights and philosophy. The monotonous drone of the same narrator speaking as both Sage & student does not work well. Characters not at all relatable. Would have read better as a straight forward how to or essay on Adlerian psychology.

2 people found this helpful

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  • JD
  • 10-07-18

this book is life changing

I will not be the same having read this book. thank you to the authors.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 03-01-20

Life changing

This book beautifully puts together the recipe to living freely and happily in an uncomplicated way.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Andrew Crook
  • 31-07-19

wow

Yea, this is a good one. I found this book insightful and relevant. The book was easy to listen to, as a dialogue the audio book format is ideal.

just as the author concluded, I am researching and learning of Alfred Adler.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 28-08-22

Average listener

The general idea or topic of the book is fair. The earlier chapters successfully draw the listener into more listening. However, it is monotonous and as such may be for a seasoned listener with keen interest in philosophical theory.

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  • Patrick
  • 26-05-22

Not Buying Into It

I get people make excuses for things, but this is almost nihilistic. It promotes disregarding competition altogether, rather than how to deal with things like failure or genuine inferiority. Not really helpful.

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  • Mann
  • 26-01-22

A bitter and powerful dose of reality

I sincerely struggled with the first hour of the book as I found the dialogue setting a bit annoying. Luckily, I persisted as the conversation started to get richer with some profound concepts like interpersonal relationships, separation of tasks and contribution. It's a heavy listen/read but worth it if you like rigour of a well defined philosophy.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Sadiyah Patel
  • 20-01-22

Life-changing!

As an avid reader who reads on average for about 2 to 3 hours a day, I can honestly say that this book was mind-blowing! It has been a long time since I have come across a book this powerful! I loved every bit! It's a bit difficult to grasp all of it at once, so I would strongly recommend a second and even third read. A phenomenal and life changing work!

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  • Mark
  • 15-11-18

I had to bang my head on the wall to feel normal

the format of student and philosopher is taken to the extreme by this annoying boring piece of nonsense.. I an a fan of psychoanalysis and also teach it professionally and was intrigued by the message but the delivery is awful. The message is sound but the delivery and style would be more suited to AD 39 in a Roman school rather than in my car. It drove me bonkers. The student was an annoying teenage moron..…..and the philosopher was a self satisfied old git ( I to am an old git but at least have a sense of that). Read Adler but avoid this

122 people found this helpful

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  • LittleBuddha
  • 12-01-20

"Trauma Does Not Exist" BOLLOCKS

Read about 20% of it and it made me feel utterly depressed.

I have a diagnosis of Complex post traumatic stress disorder so the assertion that "Trauma Does Not Exist" and that it all boils down to courage, frankly, crushed me.

Victim blaming at its worst.

Do not buy this book. It's not what it's presents itself to be.

Instead, look for an EMDR therapist who Will hear you, validate your experiences and help you to heal.

love and light x

111 people found this helpful

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  • Yas
  • 30-05-18

Fabulous and life changing.

Having recently started reading up on stoicism this book seemed like a natural addition to my learning. It complements stoicism and the style of the reading with a philosopher of Adlerian philosophy and the young student works extremely well.

I can listen to the book many times over to capture nuggets of wisdom that I missed in the previous reading. Well narrated, very beneficial and enlightening. A joy!

54 people found this helpful

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  • Shaun Taylor
  • 25-10-18

Great performance, terrible book

Excellently performed, the voice acting reminded me of the radio version of the Hitchiker's Guide To The Galaxy so gave me a warm and fuzzy feeling.

The subject matter itself was as expected from early Psychology - a series of arbitrary assertions based on what the author feels about life, unfettered by such things as evidence. Useful as a point of view, but hardly life-changing.

40 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 17-03-18

Refreshing

Found this audio book challenging at times but overall glad I stuck with it...Interesting ideas...

37 people found this helpful

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  • James
  • 22-09-18

Possibly a very important book

I've sat halfway through a second listen-through, and feel that this book could be very important for me. It's hard to say yet. It's certainly let down by the annoying voice-acting, which renders the "youth" of the dialogue more petulant than he needs to be. The voice actor over-does it a bit. In fact, I think the "acting" is unnecessary altogether. A straight (or even just slightly straighter) reading would have served this dialogue much better. As it stands, I get distracted by how unfortunately annoying the characters are.

24 people found this helpful

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  • Julie7193
  • 12-01-19

Must read

This offers an alternative viewpoint to being happy and what prevents each one of us from becoming so, I am certainly going to take this point of thinking and put it into practice. Don’t resist, live in the now .

20 people found this helpful

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  • bimble
  • 10-06-18

Very thought provoking read

I was inspired by this book and that is, I suppose, its purpose.

I have read many philosophy and psychology books in attempts to learn wisdom. This book, to steal from Tolkien, is possibly 'one to rule them all'. A real unifier of great thinking.

Adler was a great and insightful man, and this is a diamond of a book. The authors, in his footsteps, do humanity a continued service by making his wisdom both accessible and contemporary to all those who follow. (or is that lead....)

17 people found this helpful

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  • James
  • 10-02-19

Adler pshycology.. interesting and well laid out

straight to the point .. typical that it takes less than 15 words to review

14 people found this helpful

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  • T
  • 16-10-18

This book changes everything

I can't even begin to tell you how much this book has helped me in so many ways, and I think the details would be meaningless as I imagine each person will get something unique from it. So instead all I will do is recommend it to everyone.

13 people found this helpful

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  • Vivien
  • 01-03-18

Shining a light on the here and now

I found this book fascinating in that it made clear many vague ideas I already have and perhaps at times inadvertently live by. Nevertheless Many points - in particular about anger were quite new to me.
Then concept that CONTRIBUTION is the guiding star to happiness is quite profound. Also that one can only be an individual in relationship to society points out that our connections are what define us.
The point is made that it is up to each individual to discover the meaning for their own lives- that life does not in itself provide an intrinsic meaning.
I was intrigued that Adler points out that all problems are about personal relationships and that our relationships are best when horizontal- meaning that they are best kept on an equal basis rather than vertical whereby there is a power relationship.
Towards the end of the book it is pointed out that if you only shine a dim light on the here and now (so that you can look back into the past and look into the future) then the light on the present moment will be dim.
However - Adler says- the past and the future do not exist so shining the light on the present enriches every moment.
There is no sense that one should not have goals. In fact having goals is crucial. However it is the journey to get there that is the life and that moment to moment should be viewed as a dance. If the goal that was originally set is never reached in the form anticipated then nothing has been lost- the journey had been a valuable and enriching experience. One needs only courage to take the next step and to live with the intensity that is potential in every moment of life. Then even if life is short - it becomes a life well lived.
One should not live to impress others- that means one is not free. Freedom is achieved only by being true to ones own path. As soon as one tries to live by somebody else’s yard stick then one loses one’s direction. One needs the courage to make a personal contribution without looking for external praise.
It is a series of philosophies that perhaps need listening to twice! I may have distorted some points in the retelling - I would strongly recommend this book!

64 people found this helpful

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  • Katarzyna De Jesus
  • 15-03-18

Great Philosophy! Listen don’t Read!!

Love & recommend the content & main messages of this book. As long as you love philosophy & can follow the sometimes long winded conversations, you will appreciate it. The content is presented as an ongoing dialogue between a philosopher & a young man. I would hate to read the actual book, as I think I would loose interest due to this type of presentation, but listening on audible was quick & worthwhile.

22 people found this helpful

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  • Jerry Furnell
  • 08-03-18

Numbingly boring & condescending.

I find my mind wanders after a minute of listening. I can't tell the two voices apart and feel lost constantly. Perhaps reading it makes sense but if you are having trouble sleeping this will get you off in no time.

19 people found this helpful

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  • teresa
  • 15-07-18

Dumbed down too much

The idea of presenting the content as a dialogue is great to help simplify the concepts. However I found that it did not work in practice. The ‘youth’ character was presented as petulant and the ‘philosopher’ character as condescending. The idea did not pay off and the concepts were over-simplified. I persevered - confident that it would improve as we progressed through the book. It didn’t and I regret not turning it off early.

17 people found this helpful

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  • Qi
  • 14-07-18

I don't understand all the good reviews

Some points in this book are alright and can be helpful I guess. But can't say I agree with some arguments in this book. For example: "Trauma doesn't exist"; the author basically said if you have any anxiety or depression disorders, then that's because you wanted it. You are using your "anxiety" or "depression" to achieve some of your personal goals. One last point, the term "Adlerian psychology" appears way too much. I know this is a book about Adlerian psychology, but when it appears like twelve times in ten minutes, that's just way too much.

15 people found this helpful

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  • Anabel Pandiella
  • 04-09-18

Not what I expected.

Maybe I wasn’t in the right mind frame for this but I just could get into into. The voice annoyed me, the way it was structured into dialogue made it hard to engage with and I found the actual content no at all what I expected. Unfortunately not for me.

9 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 15-03-18

ACTUALLY A LIFE CHANGING BOOK. I WANTED MORE.

I had the hard copy and the audio simply because I couldn't put it down. When I couldn't read the hard copy I had Adrian's voice in my head. One of the best readings I've heard. Also, I sometimes struggle with the voices of audiobooks, but Adrian's was perfect. The book is incredible and I'll be reading it again within the month to commit to memories. The more I read it the more I'll absorb it and the easier it will become to put it into practice. EVERYONE SHOULD READ THIS BOOK. EVERYONE

7 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 13-04-18

Controversial, Fascinating

Loved it, listened twice. I have no regrets about this book, I just wish it had an e-book accompaniment.

5 people found this helpful

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  • Michael Vagg
  • 31-03-19

Really comes together in the end...

I struggled to get through this, but I stuck with it. And yes, I wish I knew about Adler 20 years ago but... the format of this book is written as dialogue. Almost like a play.

Philosopher: "speaks"
Youth: "replies"

And the narrator READS "Philosopher" and "Youth." At first hearing that, I was dismayed. I found it jarring and difficult to listen and think. But, it is dropped yet reintroduced periodically.

I also found the voices of each protagonist, as voiced by Mulraney, difficult. He is a great narrator and has a wonderful voice, but the format requires two distinct voices in conversation and I struggled listening to one person voice them interchangeably in such quick succession.

Ultimately, it was worth it. These initial annoyances faded and I found myself listening intently and was fascinated and inspired by Adlerian psychology as richly illustrated here.

The afterward, where seperately, Koga and Kishimi talk about how this book came about and how they worked together is a very important part of this book and left me feeling a lot better about having stuck with it to the end.

4 people found this helpful

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